TDI: Torture Cruise
by donki-shouben
Summary: Someone is killing off the contestants! Chapter 4 - The torture begins! Chapter 10 - The true killer revealed! Chapter 11 - The sequel - with zombies! Chapter 12 - An unexpected twist! Plus, a great ending! Also, fun with movie parodies!
1. Chapter One: Totally Dramatic Cruise

**Author's Note: This story follows events in my two M-rated TDI sex parodies**

**(the second of which got very serious near the end),**

**but you don't need to read those to understand this special tale.**

**All you need to know is that, at the end of those epic adult yarns, Courtney, Heather and Izzy**

**turned the tables on Chris and Chef and the campers took control of their destinies.**

**Also, Chris Maclean and Chef are believed dead, though they aren't.**

**The two faked their deaths, and were last seen in a mechanical shark submarine en route to Thailand, presumably to sell bootleg tapes of the X-rated show the TDI teens thought they had stopped.**

**Anything else you need to know will be revealed as the story unfolds.**

**Also, the 22 TDI contestants are a couple years older (18), and pairings are**

**Gwen/Trent, Heather/DJ, Izzy/Owen, Courtney/Duncan, Eva/Justin,**

**Katie/Sadie, Beth/Cody, Bridgette/Geoff, LeShawna/Harold and Lindsay/Tyler**

**(Noah and Ezekiel are not attached to anyone, although Noah is a special case.**

**Keep reading to find out why).**

**Oh...Almost forgot. At least one camper dies in every chapter. **

**You'll never guess who the first victim is! Heh heh.**

TDI: Torture Cruise

Disclaimer: _Total Drama Island_ is copyright Fresh TV Inc.

The author is in no way associated with the owners of the copyright.

This story was written for non-profit entertainment purposes only.

Chapter One: Totally Dramatic Cruise

_There are some things I'd thought I'd never see._ Gwen mused to herself.

_One was a few months ago..._

"I'm...I'm sorry I snapped at you when you were trying to apologize to me, Gwen. Friends?" the girl with the long, dark hair said as she extended her hand.

"S-sure, Heather." the shocked Goth responded as she shakily shook the hand of the one contestant who previously always acted like the stuck-up Queen Bee.

"Great! Well, see ya!" Heather added with a wave and a grin as she walked away.

"Bye!" Gwen smiled.

"There! Are you satisfied?" Heather said to DJ.

_The other is right now..._

_We're all together. _

_Again!_

_Although it is a bit different this time._

"Geoff! My man! High-five!"

"Owen!" Geoff yelled as he met the huge boy's palm high in the air. "I didn't think you'd make it! I heard you and Izzy got in trouble with the Egyptian government when you did that Discovery Channel show and totally wrecked the Sphinx' nose! Totally wicked, dude!"

"We didn't wreck it! Izzy was actually trying to put the nose back on! But yeah, we were in a lot of trouble and only got out yesterday. We never woulda made it, except..."

"We flew here as close as we could, then choppered the rest of the way in!" Izzy cackled. "Owie was crying the whole time! He's such a big baby when it comes to air travel!"

"Izzy!" Owen grumbled. "Anyway, it's great to be back for TDI! But I don't get it. Chris and Chef are gone, so who's doing the show? And why are we on a cruise ship?"

"I can answer some of your questions." the young man announced to the assembled group of former campers.

"Noah?!! This whole thing is your doing?!?" an amazed Justin shouted.

"Some of us have to rely on things other than our good looks." Noah snarkily replied to the one guy who was the opposite of him, the 'anti-me'.

"It's very simple, really." Noah explained. "Since we're all 18, we can sign contracts with whoever we want, so we're free to do our own TV show as long as we call it something else. FYI, Owen: It's not TDI, it's '_Totally Dramatic Cruise', _or "TDC'."

"Ohhhhh. I gotcha!" Owen said. "I can see why you're the smart one!"

"And, since Chris and his insane helper, Chef, vanished, we don't have to worry about any competition! So it was easy to get a network interested in a new show."

"You wouldn't have any ulterior motives for reuniting all of us, would you? Such as, seeing someone again?"

"Beth! Noah wouldn't do that! Besides, he knows I'm not going to fall for him! I'm not gay like he is!" Cody reassured his girlfriend.

"Excuse me, but I'm not gay. I'm Bi!" Noah corrected his one-time crush.

"Good line, dude!" Duncan commented privately to Noah. "I tell Courtney the exact same thing!"

"You tell Courtney what, Duncan?" the preppie, who overheard her boyfriend, demanded.

"Errrr..."

"Great. I can see it's going to be just as much fun as last time!" Noah dryly said. "Anyhoo, this time all the action takes place either here on the cruise ship or at various ports of call. It was a lot of work to set up! Luckily, I had some help. Heather, here, secured the cruise ship through her rich daddy's company!"

"Yeah, and I bet she got the best rooms, too!" LeShawna barked.

"That's not true! You all have the same accommodations." Noah pointed out.

"The same _luxurious _state room accommodations, might I add? I refused to let them treat us like Chris did! We even have a spa! Nobody rush to thank me all at once." Heather sniped.

Her bitchy rant was followed by very weak applause, and even weaker praise.

"Yay, Heather!" Gwen cheered all by herself. "Anyone?"

"Way to go, Heath, eh?" Ezekiel said.

"Awesome." Harold added with a lame fist pump. "Boo-yah."

But that was it. Most stood there quietly and stared at the despised, raven-haired beauty.

"Fine! Be that way! I don't care!" Heather griped.

"Heather...It'll take 'em time to warm up to you, you know?" her boyfriend, DJ, assured her.

"Doesn't deserve him." Lindsay muttered under her breath.

"What was that, Lindsay?" Heather sternly asked.

"Nothing." Lindsay mumbled.

"If you've got something to say, say it to my face!"

"I said DJ's too good for you! So there! And by the way, your shoes are still tacky!"

Heather fumed for a moment, then found her voice.

"At least I know the name of the boy I'm screwing!!" Heather shot back.

"That's it! You and me! Now!" the normally sweet Lindsay dared, balling her fists, but Tyler, Geoff and Bridgette held her back.

"Are you crazy??" Gwen talked her blonde friend down. "Heather's had spy training! She probably knows 10 ways to kill someone using only her bare hands!"

"Heather's a spy??" Owen trembled. "Oh no! Now that we know, she'll have to kill us all!"

"Owen..." Heather began. "...It doesn't matter if you know I'm a spy, as long as you keep it to yourself."

"Whew! That's a relief!" Owen mopped his sweaty brow.

"But if you tell people, and it gets out, I'll lose my job! And then I will kill you!" Heather punctuated her threat with a finger poke in Owen's chest.

"Eep!!" Owen jumped back in terror.

"Save the drama for the show, kids!" Noah instructed. "Now, who's up for the banquet before we go on the tour of the ship?"

"Food?? Oh boy! Why didn't you say so?!!" Owen yelped.

"The food isn't even the best part! Have I mentioned the special prize the winner will receive?" Noah teased.

"No. What's the special prize?" Gwen asked.

"It's a secret."

After everyone else ate, Owen was still going at it, shoveling plateful after plateful of food down his hungry gullet.

"C'mon, Owie! Noah's going to show us the big boat!" Izzy said as she futilely pulled on the rotund teen's meaty arm.

"Why? There's still food left! Go ahead. I'll catch up with you later! Chomp munch gulp!"

The cruise ship was rather large, so it took a while for Noah to show everyone around.

"...And this is the shark tank, for the extreme challenge!" Noah proudly declared as the sharks inside the tank swam menacingly. "That'll be after the food challenge."

"A food challenge?? That's an easy win for Owen!" Courtney complained.

"Yes, but Owen's a fan favorite. So we have to give him his spotlight!" Noah reasoned.

"Speaking of the big guy..." Duncan quipped as the group returned to the banquet room. "Are you still eating? Save some for the rest of..."

Then the reality game show survivors gasped!

Before them, Owen lay on the banquet table...dead!

His body was blown up to a massively huge size, much greater than normal, and there were...holes...where not even his roly poly skin could expand any more. Thus, they broke, spilling his guts out.

Placed upon his corpse was a sign. It read 'He was warned not to eat any more.'

The campers all freaked! They began screaming bloody murder, and ran for their life!

But they didn't get far.

From the ceiling vents, gas issued forth.

Soon, all lay unconscious on the deck floor.

_OmiGod!_

_Owen's dead!_

_And he was the most popular member of the cast!_

_No one is safe!_

_Who will be the next to die?_

_You'll have to read the next chapter to find out!_


	2. Chapter Two: And Then There Were 21

TDI: Torture Cruise

Chapter Two: And Then There Were 21

"Ohhhh....What the hell happened?" Gwen uttered as she slowly got up off the floor.

She looked around and noticed the others were waking up, too.

But some were...missing.

Heather.

Beth.

And Noah!

"Beth?? Where are you?!!" Cody screamed.

"Gwen, I...I don't know where..." he cried.

"I know, Cody! But we'll find her." she comforted the young man.

"They killed Izzy's boyfriend! Izzy will make them pay!" Izzy declared in the third person, then took off!

"Izzy! Where are you going?? Izzy!!!" Gwen called fruitlessly after the crazy girl. But Izzy was long gone. "Dammit! What the hell's going on??"

Meanwhile, Noah searched for something in his office on the ship.

Frantically, he took out his keys and opened the portable safe in his desk. But he didn't find what he was looking for.

"Where is it?!" he bellowed.

"Looking for this?" the voice at the door said, then held up a satellite phone.

"How? What are you doing?" Noah pleaded. "I thought we had an agreement! I did everything you asked! Why...?"

"About that...There's one more thing you have to do for me."

"Anything! Name it! Please! Just don't..."

"**Die!**"

Then the unknown assailant plunged the phone's antenna into the boy's heart!

Back in the dining room, the TDC contestants struggled to recover from the gas attack and come to grips with the horrible death of their good friend, Owen.

"Who...would do something like that?" Katie cried.

"It's a nightmare!" Sadie tearfully concurred.

Even the usually upbeat Justin could take no comfort in his own beauty.

"It's even worse." a newcomer to the scene declared. "I've been all over the ship, and the whole crew is gone! Plus, the communications room is wrecked! Whoever did this, they don't want anyone to find out!"

"Where the hell have you been?!?" Gwen demanded.

"I already told you." Heather tersely responded. "I was looking for help!"

"Well, we need to stay together! Going off by yourself, that's how people get killed! Izzy already took off, and God knows where Beth and Noah are!" Gwen, the 'psycho killer expert', ranted.

"Fine! Next time I'll ask permission, Ma!" Heather huffily replied.

"Let's get out of here." Gwen said as she led the group out of the dining room.

As they made their way around the ship, the cruise ship contestants called out to their missing friends.

Suddenly, a noise from behind some boxes!

"Is, is it safe?" the trembling girl asked.

"Beth!" Cody rushed to embrace his girlfriend. "What happened?? You had me so worried!"

"I, I was scared, and I ran, but I couldn't find anyone, and then I heard a scream, so I hid! I thought the killer came back!"

"What? No, the killer's probably long gone! Heather said she searched the ship and no one's here. It's just us!"

"I know what I heard, Cody!"

"Oh. Well, maybe..."

**SHRIEK!!**

Some of the former campers chanced upon Noah in his office.

He was sitting in his chair...dead!

On his body was a sign on which was scrawled the message "He thought he knew everything. He didn't."

_Dum da dum dum!_

_The mystery deepens!_

_Next:_

_With no killer in sight, the TDC participants attack each other!_

_And then, a most unexpected development!_

_Who will die next?_


	3. Chapter Three: Dramatic Complications

TDI: Torture Cruise

Chapter Three: Totally Dramatic Complications

"This is all your fault!" Lindsay screamed at her hated nemesis. "Some sort of payback from an enemy spy! Or, or maybe you did it yourself! You always hated Owen for winning the first TDI!"

"Plus, Owen and Izzy got that Discovery Channel TV special, and everyone knows how much you wanted your own TV show!" Bridgette offered her own theory. "Not to mention you did threaten to kill Owen, in front of everybody!"

"She's got you there, toots!" Duncan said as he brandished his switchblade.

"You're all certifiable, you know that?" Heather flatly rejected the baseless claims. "First of all, I don't have any 'enemy spies'! Second of all, I didn't kill anybody!"

"Mm-hmm! And you just happened to be 'searching the ship' when Noah was killed, is that it?" LeShawna accused the Asian-Canadian.

"Oh, like any of you couldn't have faked passing out, using noseplugs to block the gas, then killed Noah, came back and acted like you just woke up!" Heather speculated.

"Maybe we could have. But no one knows more about that type of thing than you, spygirl!" LeShawna retorted.

"If I killed those two, why would I stay here with you helpless victims? Why wouldn't I take off in a speedboat or something?" Heather shot back.

"You tell me, rich girl!"

"Anytime, home girl!"

Heather got in the black girl's face. They would surely have come to blows, but...

Just then, DJ and Harold separated the two frequently combative females.

"Guys, come on!" Gwen begged. "We have to stay together and work this out! Yelling at each other won't solve anything! Besides, Heather wanted to be on the new TDC as much as, if not more than, any of you! It's the only way she has to become more famous! So she wouldn't have ruined the show! This has to be the work of some outside killer. Also, Heather has some useful skills. So if we stop fighting, we can probably get out of this thing in one piece!"

The other TDC teens agreed with Gwen's logic.

Except one.

"Hmph!" Lindsay groused to herself. "She's only saying that because Heather's her lesbo girlfriend!"

Before leaving Noah's office, Harold glanced at the dead teen.

Noah's body was slumped back in his chair. His head lolled backwards. Blood dripped from his chest.

But his right arm.

His right arm pointed downwards.

Right at a set of keys lying on the floor.

Then the geeky boy filed out of the office and joined the others looking for a way off the cursed ship and back to civilization.

At the lifeboats, Cody observed "Well, at least the rescue rafts are okay, in case we have to get off this crazy ship!"

"That's great, Cody!" Beth smiled, relieved that at least _something _was going right! Then the line holding the lifeboat to the cruise ship, the same line Beth was hanging on...

...Snapped!

"Ahhh! Codyyyy!" Beth screamed as the thick rope yanked the unsuspecting girl over the ship's edge and down to the sea!

Followed immediately by the plummeting raft, which landed right on top of Beth, killing her instantly!

"**Beth!!!**" Cody impotently bellowed.

Before anyone could react, though, the ship's deck buckled and split in two, sending the group of terrorized teens into the bowels of the cruise ship of horror!

"Ouch!"

"Ooof!"

"Unh!"

The TDC kids uttered as they crash-landed on the dimly-lit floor below deck.

"What the hell just happened?!?" Trent yelled as he rubbed his tender noggin and examined himself for any broken bones, greatly relieved when he didn't find any.

"Remember the tour? Noah said the ship was full of secret compartments and traps built for the show. We must have fallen through one!" Harold conjectured.

Looking around at the thick wood and masonry walls, with no exit in sight, an exasperated Eva roared "Wonderful! Now how do we get out of here?!"

"Our problem's worse than that!" the ever-observant DJ noted. As he glanced around the room they were stuck in, he counted only Duncan, Eva, Harold, LeShawna, Cody, Sadie, Trent , Zeke and himself as occupants. "Where'd everybody else go?"

"Oh my God! **Katie!!!**" Sadie cried. "Where are you??"

Not that far away as the crow flies, but impossible to reach in their current situation, the other surviving cruisers dusted themselves off and picked themselves up.

"Does anyone know where we are?" Gwen asked.

"In the ship…Duh!" Courtney mocked the Goth teen's take charge attitude. Because everyone knew, or _should _have known, Courtney was the one who should be in charge! She was once a C.I.T., for crying out loud!

"Never mind!" Gwen sighed. "Let's do a headcount."

But the count was off by nine!

"We're missing at least half our group!" Gwen announced. "Quick, everyone fan out, see if you can find anyone in this mess of a deck!"

"Oh, I'd say everyone's here!" the electronically modified voice boomed out of hidden speakers. "Let's play a game."

Gwen, Heather, Lindsay, Tyler, Bridgette, Geoff, Courtney, Justin and Katie stared in horror as the nearby wall slowly rolled up, revealing a madman's playground of torture devices.

_Next:_

_The games begin, and the first of the deep, dark secrets of the cast are revealed!_


	4. Chapter Four: Drill, Baby, Drill

TDI: Torture Cruise

Chapter Four: Drill, Baby, Drill

"What game? What kind of sick psycho freak are you?!?" Heather blasted the disembodied voice that filled the cramped, dingy quarters the nine ex-campers were stuck in, the sinister area hidden below the guest room decks of the converted cruise ship.

"It's kind of like 'Truth or Dare'. Except the stakes are way higher! Heh. It's a lot of fun. And my toys are the funnest of all!"

The extremely reluctant contestants glanced fearfully at the ominous machines and devices situated behind the glass partition.

"You're crazy if you think we're playing your insane game, murderer!!" Courtney railed.

"Who said I'm giving you a choice?"

There was a _KLIK_, and pneumatic, human-sized tubes quickly dropped from the ceiling and encased each of the 'players' - Gwen, Heather, Lindsay, Tyler, Bridgette, Geoff, Courtney, Justin and Katie.

"Hey!! Let me out!" the teens screamed as they pounded and banged on the circular walls of the reinforced tubes, to no effect.

They were trapped.

Like rats!

"Actually, you do have a choice." their unseen tormentor informed them. "I can tell everyone some big, dark secret you have, or you can play with one of my machines."

"That doesn't sound so bad." Katie said.

"Then you can go first. Now then, Katie...Have you told Sadie the truth? Who her mother is?"

"I...W, what do you mean?"

"Katie, Katie, Katie...You mean you've never told Sadie her mom is really..."

"Shut up!!"

Meanwhile, in another part of the ship, all of the remaining cruisers - DJ, Duncan, Eva, Harold, LeShawna, Cody, Sadie, Trent and Zeke - struggled to find some way, _any _way, to escape their confinement.

All, that is, except Cody.

"Beth is dead." he moaned, then covered his head with his hands and stared at the damp bulkhead floor.

"Cody...Focus! We have to get out of here!" Trent advised. "Can somebody help me remove this access panel?"

"Let me at it, weakling!" Eva glared at the guitarist, then pushed him aside and attacked the metal barrier.

The bodybuilder yanked the panel off...and unknowingly pulled a wire attached to the access door.

The resulting surge of electricity fried every synapse in her brain, and left the muscular girl a twitching, smoking pile of dead flesh!

"Oh my God!"

"This place is boobytrapped!" Harold exclaimed.

Back at the 'game', the mysterious voice teased the thin, pretty girl.

"You could always play with one of my toys, Katie. Or maybe you want me to tell the other contestants how your Mom had twins, but couldn't take care of both babies, so she gave one up for adoption?"

"Stop it!"

"Only you can stop it, Katie. There's a drill over there, behind the glass. I just want to do some work on your teeth, on that beautiful smile of yours. That's all."

"What the hell is your problem? Leave her alone and let us go!!" Gwen shouted.

"You're in no position to tell me what to do, Goth girl! Oh look!"

A closed circuit TV screen dropped from the ceiling. On it were the cruisers trapped in the other part of the ship.

"Aren't those the other passengers? And there's Sadie! Maybe I should tell her you learned your Mom's secret years ago, but promised Mommy that you'd never tell anyone the truth. I wonder how Sadie would react to that tidbit of news? All those years of deceit, all those lies...Tsk tsk, Katie. I wonder if Sadie would still be your friend?"

"Don't! Please! I'll do it!!" Katie cried, her eyes awash in tears.

"Katie! Don't!!" Gwen cautioned. She had a bad feeling about this. A _real _bad feeling!

After her tube rose, freeing Katie, the solemn girl marched through the now-open partition and sat in the dentist's chair.

Suddenly, straps shot out of the chair's headrest, armrests and legrests and wrapped themselves around Katie's head, arms and legs!

Unable to move, pincers forced open Katie's mouth and the drill moved in on the girl's unprotected molars!

_Vreeeeee_

"Relax, Katie. This won't hurt a bit!"

_Nnnnrrrrgggggkkk_

"**Aaaahhhhhh!!!**"

"Heh. I lied. Just don't flinch, Katie, or..."

_kkttt-gushhhh-Vreeeeee_

The drill bored right through Katie's head and out the other side!

Then the airhead's brain and all sorts of other organic matter fell out of the hole in the back of her head.

"Ew! I guess she flinched!"

"No. No. No. Nooooo!" Lindsay howled.

"You bastard! You killcrazy, murderous bastard!" Gwen ranted.

"Yeah yeah yeah. Everyone's a critic! Now...Who's next?"

In the bulkhead compartment, the other victims of the madman mourned their own loss.

"Why...why would someone do this? Why set traps for us?" Sadie said as she stood over the dead body of Eva and dabbed her grief-stricken eyes.

"Eh, isn't it obvious? Someone doesn't want us to leave!" Zeke retorted.

"It's more than that." Harold observed. "Have you noticed? None of the so-called 'beautiful people' are here!"

DJ, Duncan, LeShawna, Cody, Sadie, Trent and Zeke anxiously looked at each other. Missing were Gwen, Heather, Lindsay, Tyler, Bridgette, Geoff, Courtney, Justin and...Katie!

_Next:_

_Who's next on the unseen killer's to-do list?_

_And what will their secret be?_

_Plus, the 'non-beautiful' group runs into more trouble!_


	5. Chapter Five: Another One Bites The Dust

TDI: Torture Cruise

Chapter Five: Another One Bites The Dust

"Are you saying I'm not beautiful, man? That hurts!" Duncan said as he twirled the switchblade knife in his hand.

"Gulp!" Harold gulped.

"I'm popular, too!" the mohawked bully menacingly grabbed Harold by the collar and held his knife to the geeky boy's throat. "You should see my fanmail! Chicks even send me nude photos! Oh. That's right. A nerd like you only gets nerdmail from other nerds!"

"Stop it!" LeShawna pushed the incorrigible criminal Duncan away from her thin boyfriend. "Harold was just making a point, and trying to make sense of this whole crazy thang!"

"That 'beautiful people' theory is interesting, eh?" Ezekiel commented. "But it doesn't explain why Tyler's with them."

"Huh. Maybe the guy behind this needed to even the sides. I don't know. Gosh!" Harold speculated.

In another part of the cruise ship, Tyler shivered in his pneumatic tube prison.

Not that he was cold.

He feared he was the next victim.

And the killer would use...chickens!

"Moving on...Who should be next? Hmmm..." the electronic voice of the M. T. C. (Master of Torture Ceremonies) boomed from speakers hidden in the walls.

"I'm not playing your game, sicko!" Courtney declared.

The limber girl had crawled up the walls of her tubular enclosure and was in the process of forcing open the lid.

"Ha! There!" she gloated as she popped the top and hopped out!

"I'm getting out of here!" Courtney exclaimed. Then she ran for what looked to be a door, ignoring the cries of her fellow, still trapped, former campers. "I'll send help!" the driven, mega-ambitious (and selfish) student council president off-handedly offered without bothering to look back or even slow down.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you."

"Why? Unhh!" Court uttered as she strained to open the heavy metal door, which seemed to be stuck. "Afraid I'll spoil your 'fun'?"

"No. It's still fun...For me."

Without warning, lasers shot out of the ceiling and cut the former C.I.T. to bloody ribbons!

The rest of the 'beautiful people' gaped in horror at the sight of another of their number...dead!

"Back to business...Let's pick...Justin!"

Meanwhile, the 'not so beautifuls' had problems of their own.

"The compartment's flooding!" Cody cried out as water rushed into their formerly water-tight bulkhead.

_Next:_

_What does the M.T.C. have planned for Justin?_

_And will the 'not so pretties' drown?_

Scorecard:

Owen - Dead

Noah - Dead

Izzy - M.I.A. (Missing in Action)

Beth - Dead

Eva - Dead

Katie - Dead

Courtney - Dead

Gwen - Game Player

Heather - Game Player

Lindsay - Game Player

Tyler - Game Player

Bridgette - Game Player

Geoff - Game Player

Justin - Game Player

DJ - Trapped

Duncan - Trapped

LeShawna - Trapped

Harold - Trapped

Cody - Trapped

Sadie - Trapped

Trent - Trapped

Ezekiel - Trapped


	6. Chapter Six: Justin and Lindsay

TDI: Torture Cruise

Chapter Six: Justin and Lindsay

"Justin...You're so beautiful. So perfect....But it wasn't always that way, was it?"

Justin said nothing to the Voice which virtually oozed smarmy condescension.

"I knew he was an ugly kid when he was little!" Heather sniped.

"No...That's not it. Justin has always been handsome. Haven't you, sweet Justin? But his family situation? Not so much."

"Justin had two of the most ugly, unattractive parents you could imagine! And not just physically, either. Poor Justin had to endure these demanding harpies dragging him to modeling audition after modeling audition, and seeing the look on the casting agent's faces when they saw THEM, his hideous mother and father!"

"You hated it, didn't you, Justin? Hated them. Your real parents! So one day, you made a call to Child Services and claimed they abused you. It was a lie, of course, but the authorities believed the 'evidence' you fabricated and put your parents in prison. How could they not? How could such a sweet, handsome boy like you lie? It was inconceivable! Then your agent set you up with new foster parents that were so much more...beautiful, and deserving of being your family."

"You replaced your parents? Wow. I'm impressed! I wish I'd thought of that!" Heather complimented the male model.

"What would people think if they learned the truth? What would happen to your modeling career?"

Justin kept his silence and glared at the room that held the villain's torture devices.

"So, submit to one of my...games, or I'll release the truth to the whole world!"

"Go ahead." Justin declared.

"Are you sure? I'm going to post all the evidence to the internet, send everything to the police, contact the press and the modeling agencies..."

"Fine." Justin barked.

Although all could tell he wasn't fine with it.

"All right. I'm sending it...Say goodbye to your beautiful past life, and hello to your future as an ugly loser when everyone finds out what a slimeball you really are!"

Meanwhile, the trapped ex-campers debated how to survive drowning as the rushing water reached their knees.

"This wall sounds hollow." Trent said after tapping on it. "I say we break it down and get out of here!"

"Dude, are you serious? That's a bulkhead wall! It's built to withstand tons of water! It's not cheesy drywall! We can't just kick it down!" Cody exclaimed.

"Then what would you suggest, smart guy?" Trent challenged him.

"This water's coming from somewhere, maybe even outside of the ship! I say we follow it and swim out of here!" Cody suggested.

"That's crazy, man! You know what kind of water pressure you'd be swimming against? And even if you made it through some 'hole' leading to the ocean, what then? You're stuck in the middle of the ocean with nothing!" Trent argued. "I say we stay on the ship and try to find some way out of this room!"

"You can stay here and die if you want, but I'm getting out of here!" Cody declared.

Then he swan-dived into the shallowly flooded compartment (the room made out of metal) and bopped his head on the metal floor.

"Cody!!" Sadie shrieked as the boy bobbed to the surface, unconscious.

DJ fished him out of the rising water and announced. "He hit his head, but I think he'll be okay."

"See? I told you it was crazy to swim! Someone give me a hand with this wall!" Trent barked.

"Cody had a good idea." Harold added his two cents' worth. "I'm going to give it a shot!"

"Harold...You be careful, baby!" LeShawna hugged her man.

"Always!" Harold grinned. Then he dove into the swirling waters and swam away.

Back at the Beautiful's Game Room, the electronically-voiced Master of Torture Ceremonies was ranting and raving.

"You all think you're so pretty and perfect. But you're NOT!! And I'll prove it!"

"Lindsay...How'd you like to play a game?" the sinister voice asked.

"No! Oh, God, please!" Lindsay cringed.

"Now, now, Lindsay. You don't have to play one of my games...if you let me tell people the truth about you."

"Now I know you're crazy!" Bridgette scoffed. "Lindsay's the nicest, sweetest person I know! There's no way she ever did anything bad!"

"Who said she did?" the voice replied. The contestants, all encased in their pneumatic tubes, could hear the laughter in the electronically-augmented speech, and feared the worst.

"Lindsay's so nice! Some would even say..._too_ nice! Do you know what I'm talking about, Lindsay?"

"No. You, you can't!" the blonde cried.

"Can't what? Can't have the tape? Why? Because you thought they were all destroyed?"

"What's he talking about, Lindsay?" a concerned Gwen asked.

"Your good friend Lindsay wasn't too good one night when she was out at a party. Maybe she had too much to drink. Maybe she was drugged. Or maybe she was just tired after a long day. However it happened, Lindsay passed out. And some boys...had some fun with her. And videotaped it."

"Oh my God!" said the shocked Gwen.

Lindsay had no response. Except to cry.

"Her family quickly hushed the whole thing up, even agreed not to press charges if the awful boys handed in all the copies of the tapes they had. What good would it do to destroy their lives, her parents told Lindsay, if people found out you were raped and your life was destroyed, too? Daddy dearest even paid the boys off, didn't he, Lindsay? Do you still remember how they smiled and winked at you as they took your Dad's hush money?"

"Shut up. Shut up. Shut up!" Lindsay whimpered.

"And now I have the tape. Want to see?"

On the video screen, for a moment, a scene of Lindsay, passed out on a bed and surrounded by four guys, played.

"NO!! Please, no more!!" Lindsay moaned.

"You sick, twisted bastard!" Tyler, Lindsay's boyfriend, shouted. "You're dead as soon as I get out of here!"

"Oooh, I'm trembling! NOT! Hey, Tyler! Bawk bawk bawwwk! Ha ha! Scared ya! Now, Lindsay, if you agree to play my game, I won't post the tape to the internet for everyone in the world to see."

"No! You'll, you'll kill me!" Lindsay said, her face streaked with tears.

"Okay. How about this. To improve the odds, you can play with your good friend, Heather."

"What??!" Heather yelped. "I'm not playing any of your..."

Without warning, Heather's tube slid across the floor and spit her out behind the glass partition. The spygirl pounded on the bulletproof glass, to no avail.

"I knew Heather wouldn't crack if I threatened to reveal a 'secret' of hers. The girl's cold as ice!" the voice continued. "Now, Lindsay, why don't you take your seat behind the glass so we can start? It'll be an honest to gosh marshmallow ceremony, and your fellow contestants get to vote either Heather or you off!"

"Seriously?" Lindsay inquired.

"Seriously! Only one of you will have to play my game!"

"O, okay." Lindsay hesitated, but ultimately agreed. What else could she do?

Her tube opened, and Lindsay walked to her area behind the glass wall, separate from Heather's. But when she sat down in the metal chair, it quickly grew restraints.

"Hey!" Lindsay yelled in surprise as the bonds held her securely to the death furniture.

"Don't worry! It's merely to hold you in place until the game is over! Oh, and Heather? Take a seat!"

Immediately, a chair rose up out of the floor on Heather's side of the room, sprouted tentacle-like straps and ensnared the stunned Queen Bee.

"Who will it be? Heather or Lindsay? One will be voted off by you, campers, in the most thrilling marshmallow ceremony yet! Oooh! This is so exciting! It's just like the show, only better! But before you make your decision...behold!"

The floor beneath the chair-confined duo rolled away, exposing a sheet of glass. Under that glass, some distance down, was a pool of water.

Not just any pool of water, though.

For in that body of water swam man-eating sharks!

"And these sharks are hungry!" the electronic voice cackled.

Meanwhile, swimmer Harold made an interesting discovery when he finally surfaced.

"The water's coming from another part of the ship! And there looks to be a way out!" he said as he spotted an open access door, beyond which was a ladder, up above the waterline on the far side of the flooding room.

_I have to tell everyone! _he thought as he swam back.

But after his fin-like feet kick-propelled him out of the room...

...Something struck him.

And Harold sank to the bottom of the watery compartment.

_Next:_

_Lindsay...AND Heather??_

_That oughtta be sweet!_

_(And it is!)_

_Who will survive? Who will die? 'Cause you know the cruel Voice ain't gonna make it easy!_

_It's the most exciting chapter yet!_

_Plus: Is Harold's ticket punched for good?_


	7. Chapter Seven: Sharkbait!

**Author's Note: When I thought of this story, this was the chapter that convinced me to write it.**

TDI: Torture Cruise

Chapter Seven: Sharkbait!

"Once you vote off the camper of your choice, their chair will drop into the pool and release her so she can meet all her new friends, the hungry, man-eating sharks, unencumbered! While the loser walks away free! So who will it be...Lindsay? Or Heather?" the cruel Voice offered.

Without hesitation, Tyler, Bridgette, Geoff, Justin and even Gwen said the name of TDI's Queen Bee.

"Looks like it's unanimous. What a shocker! I'll give you a moment to say goodbye to all of your 'friends', Heather!"

"No! Wait! You can save both of us!" Heather cried. "If you change your vote to Lindsay and free me, I can save Lindsay from the sharks!"

Heather saw Gwen hesitate, as if thinking it over, so she continued.

"Gwen! You know I learned how to do things like this in spy school! Free me, and save both of us! Don't let me die!"

"I...She does have a point. Heather probably could save Lindsay!" Gwen said.

"She couldn't even save herself!" Tyler reasoned. "I say no."

"I didn't know the stakes, so I didn't even try to get out!" Heather pleaded. "Please! Don't condemn me to die! Not when I can save me and Lindsay!"

"Sharks are survivable." surfer girl Bridgette said. "If anyone can pull this off, it's Heather. I'm changing my vote."

"Are you sure, Bridge?" Geoff asked.

After Bridgette nodded yes, Geoff changed his vote, too.

"Me three." Gwen added. "I'm changing my vote, too."

"Are you sure?" the Voice asked.

Gwen, Geoff and Bridgette assured the cruel torture master that yes, they were voting for Lindsay to be dropped into the shark tank.

With the final vote 3 for Lindsay and 2 for Heather (Tyler and Justin), Lindsay's fate was sealed.

Lindsay bawled her eyes out, causing the Goth, the surfer and the cowboy to avert their eyes.

"Lindsay! Listen to me!!" Heather commanded, speaking through the pane of glass separating the two. "Sharks are attracted to movement. So once you're in the water, go to the side of the pool and stay perfectly still! If they get too close, hit them in the nose or the eyes! I'll be in there right after you to rescue you! Do you understand?"

"Uh huh." Lindsay said through the tears running down her face.

Then the sinister villain at the controls pushed a button...

...And Lindsay's death chair plunged into the shark tank below.

It quickly sank to the bottom of the tank and released the blonde girl, who swam as gently as she could to the surface of the pool near its edge to avoid the notice of the terrible predators circling nearby and await her promised rescue.

At the same time, Heather was freed from her confinement.

She tried with all her might to break the glass that separated her from the shark's prey, but the glass was too strong.

Since Lindsay was safe for the moment, Heather figured she had time to solve the puzzle.

However...

...The devious master of misery wasn't letting them off that easy!

From out of nowhere, lasers sliced through the water and cut Lindsay's tender, bikini-ready skin!

The blood from her wounds quickly attracted the man-eaters, and they tore into the blonde in a feeding frenzy!

"Oh my God! No!!!" Gwen cried.

"Lindsay...No..." Bridgette uttered. "I'm so sorry."

Heather was shocked, also, but rather than wallow in grief, she was spurred to action.

Grasping the metal chair that moments before had been her death trap, Heather grunted and tore the chair loose from its moorings!

Then, exhibiting an adrenaline-fueled strength borne solely from the crisis at hand, Heather flung the metal monstrosity at the glass wall, shattering it into a thousand pieces!!

_**KRASHHHH**_

Without even thinking about what she was doing, the teen spy dove into the shark pool 30 feet below and knocked the sharks away from Lindsay!

Taking refuge from the vicious man-eaters behind Lindsay's chair, Heather looked up and noticed the other game players had been freed from their tubes (since their tormentor had taught them all the futility of escape, there was no reason to keep them contained any longer. And, also, to brutally give them a good look at the expected carnage). "Hey! Toss a rope down here for us, why don't you?!" Heather rather bitchily requested as the sharks pounded away at her only defense. She had one arm wrapped around the prone form of Lindsay while the other held the metal chair between her and the sharks.

Once the five 'Beautifuls' had done as ordered, and hauled up her and Lindsay, Heather laid the lifeless corpse of the vivacious blonde on the floor and said "I'm sorry. She's...gone."

"You goddamn bitch!!" Bridgette whaled her fists on Heather while she kneeled next to Lindsay's body. "You said you could save her!!"

Gwen had to pull the enraged surfer chick off of Heather who, oddly enough, took no action to defend herself.

"Stop it! That won't bring Lindsay back! And Heather did all she could! You saw how she dove into that tank! She risked her life to save Lindsay! We have to stay together!" Gwen talked the angry girl down.

Meanwhile, the other trapped ex-campers were wading in water up to their waists, with no way out!

"Harold isn't back yet!" LeShawna wailed. "Something must have happened! I'm going to find him!"

But as the urban girl prepared to dive into the water, someone stopped her.

Sadie!

"How well can you swim?" she asked.

"Well, ummm..." LeShawna sputtered.

"That's what I thought. I'll go. I was swimming champ in school, after all! Well, fifth grade, but hey, it still counts."

"Thank you, Sadie!" LeShawna hugged the plump girl. "Bring my Harold back to me!"

"Yeah, like that's going to make any difference!" Duncan jeered as Sadie swam away. He spun the switchblade in his hand and laughed.

LeShawna glared at him, which shut Duncan up real fast!

Following the current of water, Sadie soon located Harold at the bottom of a nearby water-logged compartment.

Upon surfacing, she ascertained Harold was still alive and rescue-swam him back to the other TDC contestants.

After a bit of first aid (CPR and pumping the water from his lungs), Harold came to.

"Hey, man. What happened to you?" Trent asked.

"I must have hit my head and passed out...Sorry if I worried any of you." Harold answered.

"I'm just glad my baby's safe!" LeShawna cheered.

"I...found a way out." Harold gasped. "It's not far from here."

"Yeah? That's great, man!" Trent replied.

"Alright! We are out of here!" DJ rejoiced.

"LeShawna..." Harold stopped his lady love from following the others swim out of the flooded compartment. "You should know. I didn't hit my head. Someone knocked me out. And there's more. Noah gave us a clue to who killed him. He was pointing to keys. I didn't get it at first, until I remembered this movie I talked about with him online. The Usual Suspects, where the killer is a guy named Keyser Soze."

"Harold...my man...what are you sayin'?" a confused LeShawna inquired.

"I'm saying...One of us is the killer. We can't trust anybody!"

_Dum dum da dum!_

_Next:_

_Bridgette and Geoff!_

_This won't be pretty._

_At all._

_Plus: The trapped ex-campers make a shocking discovery!_


	8. Chapter Eight: Bridgette and Geoff

TDI: Torture Cruise

Chapter Eight: Bridgette & Geoff

"Well, well, well...Heather wins invincibility yet again! The girl's got more lives than 10 cats!" said the deadly master of the torture room the remaining 'Beautifuls' were trapped in. "But enough about her. Moving on...Bridgette is next."

"Haven't you done enough? Let us go!!" Gwen begged.

"All in due time."

Gwen, Heather, Tyler, Justin, Geoff and Bridgette wandered around the room cut off from the rest of the ship. The dead bodies of Courtney and Katie lay where they fell, while Lindsay's corpse remained on the floor. The ex-campers were in shock, although a few, like Heather, scanned the area for any possible escape routes.

"Bridgette....It's time to play my game."

"I, I know what you want!" the not so perky blonde cried. "I'll tell him myself! I don't need you dropping your horrible hints!"

"How accommodating! Just like when you joined the tour and..."

"Shut the hell up, you bastard!" an angry Bridgette railed. "I said I'd tell him!!"

"Bridge, what?" a clueless Geoff asked.

"Remember when we broke up?"

"Yeah, of course! Your parents didn't approve of me, and told you not to see me anymore."

"That...wasn't true. And remember when I was on the pro surfer tour?"

"Sure I do! I was so proud of you!"

"I told you I didn't have a boyfriend on the tour. That...wasn't exactly the truth, either."

"Bridgette, if you went out with other guys, I don't care!"

"You don't understand!" Bridgette struggled to tell Geoff what really happened. "I didn't have a boyfriend on the tour, that was true...because I had boyfriends, plural! More than one!"

"But...I don't see what that..."

"Tell him, Bridgette!"

"Shut up! I am!...Geoff...You have to understand...Being on the pro tour has always been a dream of mine! So when the tour organizers said I'd have to meet with the tour sponsors before I could be approved for the tour, I went along with it...And when they wanted...more, I...I did what I had to do."

"Bridgette!" Geoff rushed to embrace his girlfriend, but she pushed him back.

"Don't. Please. I have to say this...After I...did what I did, I broke it off between us and blamed it on my parents. I couldn't face you anymore! I tried to forget you by having affairs with other guys on the tour, but it never worked out. Then, when we finally got back together, I couldn't tell you what happened, because of how you'd react. How you would feel if you found out your girlfriend was little more than a whore!"

All of the other campers were shocked, but none more than Geoff!

"Bridge...Don't say that! You can't mean that! Not you!"

"But then I thought...If you really love me, none of that would matter. So tell me, Geoff...Do you love me?"

Heather, Gwen, Justin and Tyler stared at the hard-partying, put on the spot cowboy. He stumbled and stammered over his response. The drama between the couple had them transfixed!

"Bridge...You knew I care for you more than words can say...But, but you have to give me time to take all this in!"

"That's what I thought." the lanky blonde coolly replied.

_He hates me! _Bridgette told herself. Then she walked over to the edge of the hole in the floor.

"My head is swimming like a bronc just kicked it in! But I'm sure we can work through this." Geoff sensitively added.

"Don't worry about it, Geoff. I understand."

Bridgette then extended her arms, and thought _Circle of life, circle of life..._

"Uh, Bridgette? What are you doing?"

Then the surfer girl jumped.

Right into the shark tank.

And allowed herself to be devoured by the still-hungry man-eaters, who were hardly satisfied with the slight Lindsay!

"**Bridgette!!!**" the horrified cowboy screamed.

While the others debated how they would recover the body, Geoff rambled around the torture room in a daze.

Suddenly, a drawer opened by itself and Geoff saw what he needed.

He took the gun in his hand, placed it to the side of his head...

"I'm sorry, Bridge! I should have said I loved you!"

...And pulled the trigger!

**Bang!**

"What the hell??! Where did he get a gun???" Gwen shouted as she rushed over to Geoff's dead body.

"Geoff and Bridgette...So Romeo and Juliet...right to the very end!" the Voice cackled. "And Bridgette's demise was even organic! That's living the green life! Except…Whoops!…She's not alive any more!"

"You miserable bastard! You'll pay for this!" Gwen vowed.

Heather picked up the gun and examined it. "Huh. No more bullets. Too bad. It could have been useful."

Meanwhile, the other survivors made their way to the exit in the compartment that was quickly filling with water.

And they made a shocking discovery.

There was blood in the water!

They all wondered if the blood came from Owen, Noah, or Beth, the dead campers they already knew about...

...Or from someone else.

Suddenly, a thrashing in the water!

DJ reached down, and plucked from the murky seawater a shark!

A small, 3 foot hammerhead, but still...

"Hey, look at this!" the animal lover showed the others. "Isn't he cute?"

Trent, Sadie, Cody, Harold, LeShawna, Duncan and Ezekiel stared at the shark.

And not just because its teeth were red with blood, with pieces of human skin caught on the sharp points.

No, it was because locks of red hair covered the hammerhead's prominent snout!

They gasped! Could Izzy be dead, too?

And then they couldn't gasp at all!

"What??" DJ asked. "It's just a little shark!"

"No no!" Cody pointed. "Look!"

A half dozen similar sharks surrounded DJ.

Then they jumped onto his large frame, digging their deadly teeth deep into DJ's flesh!

"Run! I'll hold them off!" DJ heroically exclaimed.

Trent, Sadie, Cody and Zeke were already through the exit hatch when it slammed shut in Harold and LeShawna's faces!

"Hey!" Harold pounded on the hatch. "Let us in!"

"I can't believe you guys are scared of some little itty bitty sharks!" Duncan smirked.

"Uh...uh..." Harold uttered, and pointed behind Duncan.

"What?" the violent criminal responded. "Oh. It's behind me, isn't it?"

Duncan turned around in the chest-high water, and there, looking at him like he was breakfast, lunch and dinner combined, was the biggest Great White Shark anyone had ever seen!

A 20 foot monster!

(All it was missing was a bib, knife and fork!)

"You want to tussle with me, pal? Come on! I haven't had a good fight since Juvie!" Duncan dared as he brandished his switchblade knife in the Great White's face.

The ensuing battle couldn't have been more one-sided, with bloody pieces and guts of Duncan flying this way and that!

Then the hatch opened.

"What the hell, man?!" Harold bitched. "Why'd you leave us here? I mean, gosh!"

"The hatch was stuck!" Trent replied "Come on!" he held out his hand and directed Harold and LeShawna to follow him up and through the hatch.

"But what about..." Harold motioned in the direction of Duncan and DJ's battles with the sharks.

"It's too late for them!" Trent coldly answered. "Now let's go!"

_The bodies are really piling up now!_

_Next:_

_Amidst the carnage, the survivors of the Torture Game fight amongst themselves!_

_Then, in a big twist, the killer is revealed!_

_And then...it gets __real__ shocking!_

_Plus: Will the others survive to see who wins the game?_

_It all ends in a major bloodbath you have to read to believe!_

Scorecard

Owen - Dead

Noah - Dead

Izzy - M.I.A. (Missing in Action/Presumed Dead)

Beth - Dead

Eva - Dead

Katie - Dead

Courtney - Dead

Lindsay - Dead

Bridgette - Dead

Geoff - Dead

Duncan - Dead

DJ - Presumed Dead

Gwen - Game Player

Heather - Game Player

Tyler - Game Player

Justin - Game Player

LeShawna - Trapped

Harold - Trapped

Cody - Trapped

Sadie - Trapped

Trent - Trapped

Ezekiel - Trapped

Chris - Presumed Dead

Chef - Presumed Dead


	9. Chapter Nine: Gwen and Heather

TDI: Torture Cruise

Chapter Nine: Gwen and Heather

"Who's next, huh? Who???"

The unseen voice had no response to Gwen's question.

But, someone else did.

Someone who didn't know enough to shut her mouth!

"It's obviously you, Gwen!** If **that's your real name! God knows what you get up to with those freaky friends of yours!" Heather needled the goth girl.

"And what the hell would you know about that?" Gwen sharply retorted.

"Oh, I did some checking. Your 'friend' Reaper has a rap sheet a mile long!"

"Only because the cops have been hassling him for years! Dammit, Heather, what is your problem?!"

"I was just protecting myself in case I ever ran into them. It's real easy to scan police databases when you're a spy! Oh, by the way, Gwen? You have plenty of psycho fans! They're all over the internet! Any one of them could be behind this travesty!"

"Me? What about you? I suppose none of your spy buddies could have done this?"

"Don't be absurd! They have better things to do than trick out cruise ships with death traps!"

"Speaking of tricked out cruise ships...This is your daddy's cruise ship, yet you know nothing about what happened to it?"

"No, of course not! Noah was in charge of all of the cruise ship modifications for the show!"

"And I suppose you had nothing to do with the rooms, or that spa you were raving about? You're full of shit, Heather, you know that?!"

"I don't know why you're blaming me! I'm as much a target as any of you! I almost died, remember? Besides, isn't it obvious? The killer is Chris! He was so angry that we went and did a show of our own, this is his revenge!"

"But...Chris and Chef are dead! Unless...you know something you haven't told us?"

"Just rumors...Unsubstantiated sightings in the Far East that couldn't be confirmed."

"And you mention this now?!? Goddammit, Heather! I trusted you! I stood up for you! And this is how you repay me? You haven't changed one bit! You're still pulling the same crap! You're still a goddamned b-"

"Shut up!" Heather angrily slapped Gwen in the face. "I didn't do shit!"

"Oh, that's it!" Gwen said as she rubbed her red cheek. She advanced on the raven-haired one, hate filling her eyes.

"Ladies, please!" Tyler cried out as he jumped in between the two teens who frequently sparred on the old Total Drama Island TV show, pulling pranks on each other, but who had never resorted to fisticuffs to settle their differences.

Tyler faced Heather, hoping to block her from Gwen.

Gwen, meanwhile, was restrained by Justin, who placed his hand on the goth's shoulder.

"Get lost, Tyler!" Heather shoved the jock out of her way. "If Gwen wants to fight me, I'll gladly oblige her!"

"Get away from me, Justin!" Gwen barked as she slipped out of the model's grasp. "Heather's had this beatdown coming for a long time!"

The two female combatants circled, each looking for an opening.

"Are we going to just let them fight like this?" Tyler asked Justin.

"Why not? It's not as if we have anything better to do! Maybe the crazy kook in charge will be satisfied with some girl-on-girl action? Besides, you can't do anything about the situation. I've never seen a more useless person in my entire life!"

"Hey! You take that back, or..."

"Or what? You'll trip and fall on me?"

Before the two dudes could start their own fight, there was a sound.

A knocking.

From INSIDE the sarcophagus in the torture room!

And then...

...A voice!

A human voice. Not an electronic one.

"Help! Let me out!"

In another part of the cruise ship, the other still-living passengers (Trent, Cody, Sadie, Ezekiel, Harold and LeShawna) slowly made their way through the gloomy passageways (since the ship was on emergency power, lighting was limited) until they came to a brightly-lit room (it had its own generator).

Inside the room was a bank of television monitors.

Closed-circuit TV monitors.

"What is this? The security room?" Trent asked.

"No. Look." Harold pointed out one of the screens. "There's the confession cam in the spa that Noah showed us!"

"So...This is the producer's room?" Cody wondered.

"Must be." Harold replied.

"Who puts a confessional in a spa, anyway?" Zeke inquired.

Trent, Cody, Sadie, Harold and LeShawna looked at each other.

"Heather!" they responded in unison.

"Ah." Ezekiel finally grasped the extent of the Asian-Canadian's ego and love of luxury.

"I have to give Heather credit for one thing. That spa was fi-ine!" LeShawna whistled, drawing dirty looks from Sadie and Trent.

"Not a good time, huh?" LeShawna sheepishly added.

"This is interesting." Harold said as he flipped through the producer's handbook for the _Totally Dramatic Cruise _TV show. "It says the special prize for the winner is their own TV show. Trent, didn't you say you wanted your own music show?"

"I say a lot of things! What does that have to do with anything?" he snapped.

"Only that you were pretty eager to get in that accessway, the one that electrocuted Eva! And then the hatch just happened to get 'stuck' when we were trying to escape the sharks!" Harold voiced his theory.

"What are you saying, foureyes? You think I'm the killer? You're insane!"

"Noah gave us a clue. The killer's one of us. I just haven't figured out who yet. But I will." Harold got in Trent's face. "Oh, I assure you, I will."

"Harold, baby, maybe you should keep that to yourself!" LeShawna advised as she pulled her beau away from the ticked musician.

"Oh yeah? Well, whoever's screwing with us separated most of the couples, but not you and LeShawna. Why do you think that is?" Trent speculated.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Harold retorted.

"You tell me." Trent vaguely threatened.

"Guys! There's another room of monitors!" Cody urgently announced. "You have to see this!"

Scanning the screens, Trent said "Is that Gwen and Heather fighting? It's about time!!"

"Forget that! Look over there! And there!" Cody indicated monitors which were trained on the flooded compartments they just came from.

But that wasn't what Cody was upset about.

On another bank of closed-circuit TVs, the dead bodies of Katie, Courtney, Lindsay and Geoff appeared.

"Ho-ly sh--!!" Trent gasped. "What the hell's been going on???"

The others were speechless.

"Is there sound on this, Cody??" Trent asked, but got no reply. "**Cody!!!**" he screamed.

"Okay! I'll look for the sound button!" Cody finally answered and ran around the cluttered room.

"Where is this?" Trent inquired.

"It says..." Harold squinted and tried to make out the words written on the tape below the monitors. "...Aft cargo hold."

"Aft?"

"In the rear of the ship!"

"Okay, we're going there right now!" Trent took command of the situation.

"Wait!" Cody exclaimed. "I think there's a broadcast connection to the home studio! I may be able to break in and tell them about our situation."

"Okay, you do that. And the rest of us will go to the cargo hold."

"I'm not going anywhere near that hellhole! Katie..." Sadie muttered as she nervously rocked back and forth in the producer's chair, eyes wide from witnessing the horror or her best friend's corpse.

"Alright...Cody and Sadie will stay here. Harold! LeShawna! Zeke! Let's go!" Trent ordered.

"Go get 'em, guys!" Cody cheered. Then the techie noticed something unusual.

"Why is that red light on?"

Rushing through the dimly-lit cruise ship hallways, Harold turned a corner...

...And ran into a hulking, blood-stained figure!

Back in the cargo hold, Gwen and Heather's fight was interrupted by the plea for help from the sarcophagus.

Since they were closer, Tyler and Justin opened the ancient Egyptian casket.

And out popped...

"Beth??" Tyler croaked. "How did you get in there?"

"Someone put me in there. Oh, here."

From behind her back, Beth produced...

...Chickens!

"Ahh!!" Tyler screamed, fell over, and knocked himself out.

"Beth? What the??" a puzzled Justin said.

"You're next!" Beth chirped.

Then she threw a caustic liquid in the model's face!

"Owww! What the fu!! Oh my God! The pain!" Justin screamed, and raked his fingernails over his formerly pretty face.

"Acid. It's my gift to you." Beth blithely added. Then she ripped a spear from one of the suits of armor standing in the torture room. "Here's another one."

And Beth, quiet little farmgirl Beth, stuck the spear in the male model as far as it would go, then pulled it back out, sending Justin into paroxysms of pain!

To the amazement of Gwen and Heather!

"Don't worry." Beth said as she fixed the glasses on her face. "I haven't forgot about you bitches!"

Cody, watching it all unfold in the producer's room, could only utter "Beth...No...Why??"

Meanwhile, Trent, LeShawna and Ezekiel skidded to a stop behind Harold, who feared his life was about to end.

But...

"My man! How you doin'?"

"DJ?" Harold gasped. "Oh wow! We thought you were a goner, what with that monster shark back there!"

"Yeah, I thought I was, too!" DJ replied. "But after eating Duncan, I think the shark got indigestion! He looked a little green around the gills! Anyway, I made it out!"

"That's great! But we have a situation!" Trent informed the gentle giant. "There are more of us dead in the cargo hold!"

"No! Is...is Heather?"

"No. She's alive. We saw her fighting Gwen!"

"Huh??"

"Never mind! Let's go!!" Trent urged the others follow him as he ran down the hallway.

"You think you're all so pretty and perfect!!" Beth ranted as she advanced on Heather and Gwen, pointing the blood-tipped spear at them. "But I know you're not! I know the truth!!"

The two frantic teens backed away and tried to reason with the insane farmgirl.

"Beth?" Gwen pleaded. "You don't want to hurt your friends! Please, calm down, and put the spear down!"

"I always knew Chris picked a bunch of psychos for that show!" Heather bitched.

"Heather! Not helping!" Gwen complained.

"You're not my friends! You killed my friend with your vote to save Heather!"

"You mean Lindsay? I'm sorry, we didn't want..."

"You killed my Owie! Die, murderer!!"

From out of nowhere, a bloody Izzy, wearing a dress torn in a hundred places, leaped on the crazy Beth and plunged a knife into her chest!

A death gurgle issued from Beth's throat, and she fell onto the cold steel floor.

"Izzy? Where the hell did you come from?? Why, what happened to you?" Gwen searched for answers.

"Oh, this?" Izzy replied, pulling at her blood-stained clothes. "You should have seen the other guy! Ha! Nah! Ran into some sharks! No biggie!" she grinned, making as much sense as Izzy usually does.

That is, none.

"Oh. I...see." Gwen blankly responded.

"So...Who's up for S'mores?" nutty Izzy asked.

"No..." Beth gasped, and pulled herself up onto her feet. She used the spear to steady herself. "You won't...cheat me of my revenge."

Then Beth impaled Izzy's back on the tip of the spear, and ran it straight through the other side of her body until the spear exited the redhead's chest!

Izzy fell to her knees and died instantly.

"Oh no!! Oh my God no!" Gwen cried, and covered her mouth in shock.

"We...did it...Heather..." Beth uttered her last words, then fell over dead.

"It is true!" Gwen almost couldn't believe it, but there it was. "You...This is all your doing! Why, Heather?"

In the producer's control room, Cody finally flipped the switch that controlled the sound.

"There! Now what's that red light for? Is it actually broadcasting all of this?" the tech geek wondered.

_"Why did you kill all those people? I know you didn't like them, but to kill them??"_

_"You're ranting! I didn't..."_

_"Did you really risk your life to save Lindsay? Or did you want it to look like you did? What did you do, have shark repellant hidden on you somewhere?"_

_"Shark repellent?? This isn't some cheesy old TV show! Now I know you're loopy!"_

_"Oh, God, you fooled everyone! But you're not getting away with this!"_

Then Gwen launched herself at the teen spy.

_"Get away from me!!" _Heather swatted the goth girl, sending Gwen barreling backwards!

Right into...

...The spear jutting out of Izzy's chest!

Gwen's head jerked upwards. _"Ughkk!" _Then the light in her eyes went out, and she was gone.

_"Gwen?? No. It can't...She wasn't even...How could I...No. No!!" _a stunned Heather cried.

Just then, police helicopters appeared in the sky above the cruise ship of death, called there by the home studio when they saw what was occurring on the ship.

As the police led a handcuffed Heather away, Trent and the rest finally reached the rear of the boat.

"Heather?" her boyfriend, DJ, asked. "What happened? Heath?"

But the Asian-Canadian teen had no words for her lover and, with head down, quietly marched into the police chopper, which flew away as the cruise ship survivors watched.

_Next:_

_One Week Later_

_&_

_Six Months Later_


	10. Chapter Ten: One Week Later

**Author's Note: You'll probably have some questions after this chapter. Patience. ALL WILL BE EXPLAINED.**

TDI: Torture Cruise

Chapter Ten: One Week Later

One Week Later...

"I can't believe we're putting our friends in the ground. The ones we could find, anyway. I mean, Gosh!" Harold said as he, LeShawna, Sadie, Trent, Cody, Ezekiel, DJ, Tyler and a face-bandaged Justin stood silently next to the graves of Owen, Noah, Izzy, Eva, Katie, Courtney, Lindsay, Bridgette, Geoff, Duncan, Gwen and...Beth.

"I still can't believe Beth would...I knew she didn't like Noah, but, to do that..." Cody struggled with his feelings for the one all blamed for the cruise ship bloodbath.

"I know, Cody. Sometimes people aren't who you think they are." Sadie said. She had learned, through transcripts of the recordings of the killer's 'sessions', the truth of her relationship to Katie. "Let's get out of here."

"It was a nice service, eh?" Ezekiel said to DJ. "Too bad Heather couldn't make it."

"She's...still being detained by the police for questioning." a despondent DJ replied.

"Courage, man." Zeke said. Then he hugged the big guy.

"Thanks."

Outside the cemetery, a gauntlet of reporters.

"Is it true Beth Olsen, the alleged killer, was the cousin of the psycho killer of Muskoka?" one reporter yelled out.

"Cody! Did you have any indication of what Beth Olson was really like?"

"Get away from me, you leeches!" Cody barked as he forced his way past the newshounds to a waiting vehicle.

"DJ! What are your thoughts on the involvement of Heather Nakamura in this tragedy?"

"Justin! What can you tell us about your experience?"

"Geez! I've never seen Justin run _away from _a camera before!" Trent said to Harold and LeShawna, who were standing next to their automobile. "Well. Later, guys." he sadly added. His love, Gwen, was gone, leaving a hole in the musician's heart.

"Yeah. Later."

Then Harold and LeShawna got into their car.

"Beth never was the same after she was cursed by that idol she took from Boney Island." LeShawna noted.

"I suppose...But I don't get it...Even if Beth hated the 'pretty' campers, and Noah, who she thought was trying to 'steal' Cody from her...Why kill Owen? Everyone liked him! And why were the bodies of Owen and Noah missing?? It doesn't make any sense!"

"Beth must have gotten rid of the dead bodies, and probably planned to do the same for the others, but something must have disrupted her timetable. Who knows what she was thinking? The girl was nuts, hon! That explains a lot!" LeShawna commented as she drove off.

"I guess."

After the reporters, bystanders, celeb-seekers and obsessed fans of the weird had left the cemetery, late that night, a stirring in the earth.

The soil shifted and shook, and two female hands thrust out of the ground!

Followed by...the rest of the body, topped by a shock of red hair!

"Did you bring it?" 'Izzy' requested of the dark-robed stranger standing next to 'her' grave.

"Yes. Here is the chilli, maman."

"Good!" 'Izzy' then dipped her hand into the bowl, anointed her body with drops of the liquid, then drank the rest of the chilli rum.

"My garments?"

"Here, Maman Ghede."

The man handed a black and purple robe to the reanimated corpse of Izzy.

"Did everything proceed as you wished, maman?"

"More or less. Ever since those fools conjured me at that camp, I knew my way back to the world lie through them. Then, when the redhead attempted her pitiful 'magic', I had my host. But to make my existence on this plane permanent, I needed the blood sacrifice of the ones who were at my summoning. With those known as 'Chris' and 'Chef' missing, I had to rely on the others there. It was so easy to bend the weak spectacle-wearing one to my will by magnifying the tiny darkness in her soul, and to use the greed and unspeakable desires of the one who thought so highly of himself against him, making him do my bidding. The blood of that group of young ones was so strong! Ahhh!!" 'Izzy' reveled in the strength of her new body.

"The only drawback was I had to allow the fat one to touch my person, lest I give myself away. But he paid for his effrontery! I did run into a little trouble when I disposed of my first kills so their deaths could not be linked to my host body, and later when my host's soul attempted to alert the authorities to my work. But that meddlesome soul is gone now! This body is mine, for eternity! And while it's unfortunate the dark-haired one escaped her fate, the sacrifice of the one with the blue scalp was unusually powerful, so that can be overlooked. But enough of recriminations. The power I received from their sacrifices was more than worth it!"

"Are you powerful enough to stand against the houngan?" the robed man asked.

"Not yet, my bokor." 'Maman Izzy' replied. "But soon. Now...Cover up the grave and let us leave this place far behind. We have much to prepare."

_Well._

_Talk about unexpected!_

_Next:_

_A change of pace, as we flash forward six months and see what's become of our cast._

_If you thought this chapter was strange, you ain't seen nothing yet!_

_And after that, the truth is revealed in the most astonishing episode of TDI ever!_

Notes

This story follows my two M-rated sex parodies. In the second of those, Chris mentioned 'zuvembies', or juju zombies. Not true zombies, juju zombies are reanimated corpses possessed by _loas, _or voodoo spirits. Chris and Chef's lousy invocation of the zuvembie ritual during a practice run for the show attracted a particularly cruel loa to the campsite, and that loa gained access to Izzy when she practiced tantric sex magic. That's why Izzy stops referring to herself as 'E-Scope', was no longer afraid of flying in a plane and didn't particularly care for Owen anymore, gladly making him her first sacrifice. That also explains why Izzy tried to 'fix' the Sphinx - so she could use it for her rituals.

Houngan - voodoo priest or good witch doctor

Bokor - voodoo sorcerer or evil witch doctor


	11. Chapter Eleven: Six Months Later

TDI: Torture Cruise

Chapter Eleven: Six Months Later

Six Months Later...

"I'm sorry, Ms. Nakamura, but I'm going to have to deny your request to be reinstated to covert duty." the CSIS (Canadian Security Intelligence Service, Canada's CIA) official informed the teen spy.

"But why? I was cleared of all those charges stemming from the cruise ship...incident, and I'm perfectly fine and healthy. What happened had no impact whatsoever on my performance! You've seen my glowing evaluation on the practice ranges!" Heather testily argued her case.

"I have. And that's the problem. Our psychiatric staff believes you're suppressing the trauma of what you went through. No one should be able to brush off mass murder committed before their eyes so easily. No one's that cold!"

"Oh, you don't know Heather. She's like that all the time!" DJ chuckled.

Heather briefly flared her nostrils, then sweetly said "Could you excuse me for a moment? I have to speak to my...associate."

Out of earshot, Heather laid into DJ "When I asked you to accompany me, DJ, it was for moral support. Not to imply I'm sociopathic!!"

"Sorry, Heather! I'll be quiet."

"Good."

But no matter what Heather said in her defense, the decision of the government official stood.

Heather would globe trot no more, and be relegated to desk duty for an indefinite period of time.

"Well...It could have been worse. You still have your job!" DJ looked on the bright side as the couple walked down the streets of Ottawa.

"DJ, you don't get it! Without field experience, my career at CSIS is over!" the raven-haired one bitched.

"Oh." DJ frowned. Then he turned that frown upside down! "Hey, if you're on desk duty, you'll be spending more time at home!"

"Yeah! How about that!" Heather said with a plastic smile. She meant it sarcastically, but the gentle giant took it as sincere.

Heather sighed and smiled (a real smile this time). It was impossible to stay mad at DJ. As Heather herself once said, "The power of nice is huge!" And DJ had nice in spades. It was the one thing that could defeat the normally conniving teen. DJ was so nice, Heather's nasty jibes and mean-spirited put-downs had no effect. So, most of the time around her boyfriend, Heather didn't even bother with the bitch persona she usually wore like super-emotional armor. What would be the point of acting that way, if the desired response wasn't generated? Plus, someone treating her well when she was laying on the hate only made Heather feel worse.

Gwen and LeShawna could have beat Heather a long time ago if they had been nice to her every time she perpetuated some terrible prank against them. Instead, they took the bait and sunk to Heather's level, the level where she alone was the master.

"The worst part is, most people watching the news and reading those trashy tabloids think **I** had something to do with that cruise ship nightmare, so I'm stuck with this crappy job! But without my spy cover as an international jet-setting celebrity, I'll never get my dream job - my own TV show called 'The World According to Heather'. It'll never happen now." she moaned. "I always wanted to be famous, but not like this!"

"Cheer up, Heath! Something will come up. You'll see!" DJ's upbeat mood was infectious. Even Heather brightened.

"Maybe you're right, DJ. Maybe I do need a change of...Huh?"

Heather saw something that couldn't have been there.

Or, rather, _someone_!

_Is that...Gwen? _Heather thought as she passed a store window in which an image of the deceased goth teen appeared. _And why does she look so...upset?_

"Heather? You drifted off, girl! You okay?"

"What??" the long-haired teen spun around. The apparition of Gwen was gone

"I'm okay. I'm...fine. Just tired. That's all. It's been a long day."

"Okay. Why don't we have dinner at home? I'll make your favorite - spicy noodle soup - and we'll turn in early!"

"Sounds great! Lead the way!" Heather replied, then wrapped an arm around her boyfriend and sauntered down the street to home.

Heather worriedly gazed at her reflection in another store window. _Were they right? Am I cracking up?_

Then she saw someone who wasn't a ghost!

"Oh! I just remembered something I have to do! Go ahead and I'll meet you at home. Love you!" Heather unexpectedly kissed the big guy and ran off.

"Uh, okay." DJ, puzzled, scratched his head. "See ya!"

Meanwhile, in an apartment he could no longer afford, the former male model, Justin, stared at his own reflection in the mirror and debated whether to take off the bandages that covered his acid-pocked face.

Suddenly, a sound from the next room interrupted his lonely reverie.

At the place he shared with LeShawna (their own place; not his Mom's home), Harold walked into the kitchen to make a snack.

Immediately, his keen senses alerted him to danger!

Also, he saw black-garbed ninjas hiding under the kitchen table, behind the island counter, and on the side of the refrigerator.

"LeShawna!" Harold called to his lady love who was in the living room. "Did you order any ninjas?"

"No, hon! Not me! Uh uhh! Why you askin'?"

"Oh, snap!" Harold exclaimed. "Er, never mind!" he responded to his oblivious girlfriend.

"It's on!" Harold took out his nunchuks, twirled them around and challenged the three martial art masters to a duel. He waved to them to start their attack. "Oh, yes. It most definitely is!"

At a nightclub where he was scheduled to perform a concert that evening, Trent did a soundcheck.

From out of nowhere, a group shuffled into the club and approached the stage.

"I appreciate you want to listen to my music!" Trent said. "But the club is closed now. Come back later and hear ALL my songs!"

However, the crowd wouldn't leave, and got nearer and nearer to the stage.

In his basement lab, Cody puttered away on one of his inventions.

Suddenly, the music on the radio was replaced by static.

And the static seemed to sound like...somethingelse!

In her Toronto home, Sadie fixed a lonely meal.

In fact, all her meals were lonely, ever since BFFFL (Best Female Friend For Life) Katie...passed away.

Then, a knock at the door.

Or was it a knock?

It almost seemed more like..._scratching_?

"What the hell are you doing, following me?!!" Heather had snuck up on the person shadowing her and jumped the multi-pierced stalker, driving the goth to the ground! "Wait! I know you! You're Gwen's friend! Pixiefrog!"

"My name's Pixiecorpse! And I wasn't following you! Now get off me!!" shouted the dark-clothed girl who was in an unbreakable hold Heather had learned in spy school. Her inability to move soon convinced the goth teen to adjust her attitude and loosen her tongue. "I wanted to ask you something, but I thought you might think I was crazy, so I hesitated."

"I'm listening. Ask away!" Heather instructed.

"Have...Have you seen Gwen?"

Heather was shocked into silence. Her mouth gaped wide. Her eyes became big as coasters.

"You have, haven't you?"

"DJ? Oh, thank Bondye (the good God) I found you!"

DJ wheeled around on the Ottawa street, the crisp autumn air chilling his face, and beheld someone quite unexpected.

"Grams? What are you doing here?? I thought you were in Jamaica?!"

"There's no time for that! You and your friends are in terrible danger!"

Immediately, Justin was beset by a horde of shambling figures!

Meanwhile, Harold was kicking ninja ass!

"Ha! Not this time, bitches!" Harold yipped as he sweep-kicked the home invaders to the floor!

After defeating the last of the black-clad trio, Harold bent down, pulled off his opponent's ninja mask...

...And got the surprise of his life!

At the club, the crowd rushed the stage and attacked Trent! Using his guitar, the musician fought them off! Trent was about to flee, when he spotted a familiar face...

The odd sound on the radio was a voice!

And, even odder, Cody realized whose voice it was!

"I'm coming!" Sadie called out in an attempt to quiet the eerie scratching at her front door. She slowly opened it. Then, Sadie saw who was standing there...

"Nice try! But I'm not falling for your freak tricks!" Heather screamed at the goth who had been after her.

"It's no trick! Somehow, Gwen came back!" the terrified teen yelped.

"That's insane!" Heather got up off of the one known as Pixiecorpse, but wisely kept her distance. "And so are you!"

"Listen to me! Sometimes, for laughs, me, Gwen and a couple of our friends would break into graveyards and do these weird rituals. I thought it was all fake, but I think we did some real magic! Now Gwen's spirit is back, but I don't know why!" a frightened Pixiecorpse gasped out her theory. "It, it's like I heard her in my head and she said to warn you!!"

"Get lost, freak!" an extremely skeptical Heather yelled. "Boo hoo, you lost your friend! But don't think you can drag me into your crazy world to make up for it! I better not see you again, or..." Heather threatened as she walked away.

"You know I'm telling the truth!" Pixiecorpse shouted at the departing Heath. "You'll be sorry!"

"I'm already sorry I ever met those losers!" Heather muttered.

"If what you're saying is true, Grams..."

"I wish it wasn't, grandson. But it is."

"Then I have work to do!" DJ tied a headband on and became very, _very _serious! "My friends need me!"

His assailants piled on Justin, and brought him down.

To Harold's surprise, the face under the ninja mask belonged to...

...Duncan!!

"What?? How? You're d, d, d..." Harold stuttered and squirmed away from the brought back from the dead delinquent. His mind whirling, Harold struggled to come up with a workable defense strategy.

All while the ghoulish Duncan crept ever closer to the petrified teen.

Then...

**Bang!**

Duncan was shot in the back, sending him sprawling to the floor!

"Follow me if you want to live!" Chef exclaimed.

"What? **Awesome!**" Harold complimented.

"This old thing?" Chef glanced at the shotgun.

"No! What you said!"

"Come on, nerd!" Chef barked. "That ain't gonna stop him for long!"

Already, zombie Duncan was slowly getting to his undead, shaky feet.

"LeShawna, my love? Time to go!" Harold yelled to his unsuspecting girlfriend.

"Whutchu talkin' 'bout, sugar?" LeShawna said. Then she walked into the room.

"**Eeeeeee!!!**"

"Bridgette??" Trent bellowed in surprise in the darkened nightclub. "How, how can you be here??"

Unfortunately, the shock of seeing ALIVE someone who was supposed to be DEAD delayed Trent's escape, and the undead horde caught up to the musician!

"Beth?" Cody said, as if the radio voice could hear him.

"Katie?" Sadie anxiously said upon seeing who was outside her door.

"You again?" Heather bitched when the image of Gwen appeared to her a second time. "I'm not playing these games!"

"Come on, come on! Answer the phone!" a worried DJ snapped. "Zeke? You okay? _Phewww! _That's a relief! There's something strange going on! Yeah. Stay safe! I'll call back in a few minutes!"

Marshaling all his strength, the scarred former model threw off his attackers!

But the shuffling monstrosities were far from defeated. They renewed their assault, and Justin realized he knew one of them.

"Noah? Is that you? Wow. You don't look good! Of course, I've seen better days, myself." Justin said as he avoided Noah's clumsy attack and then punched the dead know-it-all in the face.

Retracting his fist, Justin noticed half of Noah's face came with it, leaving a formless, pulpy mass on top Noah's shoulders.

Seizing his advantage, Justin tore into the rest of the undead, and the fighting-mad model soon had all of them writhing helplessly on the ground.

"Let me say it this time!" a new voice yelped. "Follow me if you want to live! Boo-yah!"

It was Harold and Chef.

"So, pretty boy! You can do more than strut across the runway! I'm impressed!" Chef approvingly said as he, Harold and Justin ran through a gauntlet of zombies blocking their exit from Justin's apartment.

"Where'd you get the mad fighting skills, dude?" Harold asked.

"I didn't have a choice. I knew I couldn't rely on...my body to protect me like I used to. Not after what happened to me!" the face-bandaged teen cried.

"Haven't the scars healed by now?" Harold inquired.

"They'll never heal!" Justin snapped. "And isn't Chef supposed to be dead?"

"Yeah, probably not the best time to bring that up." Harold replied as the trio hacked and slashed their way through the zombie army.

"So? You're okay?" DJ, holding the phone to his ear, asked.

_"Sure, man!" _Tyler replied. _"It's quiet out here in the boonies!"_

After DJ asked, for some strange reason, if Tyler was close to any cemeteries and Tyler responded 'No.', DJ requested he go to a safe place and wait for further instructions. So Tyler left his grandparent's home (his grandparents were away at the moment) and walked past the neighbor's farm on the way to the bus station in town.

Suddenly, a field the farmer used for...disposal...of dead fowl stirred.

A tiny head popped out of the ground.

Followed by many more.

Very quickly, Tyler found his path blocked...

...By zombie chickens!

**Ahhhhhhh!!!!!!** he screamed and ran.

But the re-animated poultry caught up to the fleeing boy, jumped all over him, and pecked.

And pecked

And pecked some more.

"Uh uh, I ain't going anyplace anymore with Darkman and a crazy dead guy unless someone starts spilling!" LeShawna demanded of the very much alive Chef before she'd get in the car with him, Harold and Justin. "What the heck's going on, why ain't you dead, and where's Chris??"

"Twenty-five of us went into the jungle that night. Only five came back out." the shell-shocked veteran mumbled.

"LeShawna, we have to go. Now! I mean, gosh, there's zombies and who knows what else after us!" Harold moaned.

"No. I'll tell her. You deserve that much." a much more lucid Chef interjected. "It started as just another challenge. Voodoo zombies. 'Won't that freak the campers out!' Chris said. He also saw it as a way to finally get some work out of those lazy interns, who kept on dying on us! I didn't like it...at first. Then I saw what zombies could do for us! Sighhh." Chef's eyes glazed over as he recalled a particularly steamy encounter with a female zombie. "Then it all went wrong. We tried to cover it up as best we could and bury the whole thing, but something...escaped. Chris thought we could fake our deaths and run, but the past always catches up to you."

"Wow. I thought Chris was messed up before, but screwing around with zombies??" Justin whistled in disbelief.

"So, um...Where is Chris?" Harold asked the question on everyone's mind.

"Chris is dead." Chef coldly replied. "Really, _really _dead! None of this coming back to life stuff for him! Not after what she did to him. What she plans to do to all of us!"

"She??"

"Trent! You finally answered your cell! I was starting to get worried! You okay, man?" DJ asked over the phone.

_"Dude, the dead have come back to life!" _Trent replied. _"Of course I'm not okay! I'm totally freaking out!!"_

"But you're somewhere safe? Good! We're all meeting up at Cody's. He thinks he has a way to stop this whole nightmare. Talk to you soon!" DJ added. Then he received a call. "Harold? And you're in a car with LeShawna and Justin? Great! What do you mean Chef's with you? Is he a zombie, too? He isn't?? Oh, never mind! Go to Cody's place. Yeah, I got in touch with Zeke, Tyler and Trent, also. They're okay!"

"I, I did what you wanted!" Trent trembled as Bridgette and the other undead horrors held him tight, their zombie spittle and bodily fluids oozing all over him. "Now let me go, Izzy!"

"Maybe later, music man." the zombie queen cackled. "First, tell me where your friends are going."

"That only leaves Sadie..." DJ ran through the rest of the TDI survivors.

"**Katie!!**" Sadie shouted joyfully and threw her arms around her best friend. "It is you!"

"...And..." DJ continued.

"What are you doing??" Heather bellowed to the apparition of Gwen. "You're in my head! You're real?? What do you mean, Trent's in danger and I'm the only one who can save him?!" Heather asked Gwen's ghost, who was now gesturing frantically.

Following Gwen's pointing finger, Heather turned around.

And saw...

Eva.

Courtney.

And Owen. Plus a few more standing in the shadows.

All dead. All re-animated. And all there for her.

"So, this is how it's going to be, huh? Fine! Bring it! I never liked any of you, anyway!" Heather dared the undead battle her.

"Katie? What, what are you doing?" Sadie nervously asked as her BFFFL (Best Female Friend For Life) grabbed Sadie's meaty arm. Then Katie demonstrated that, since she wasn't alive, she wasn't Sadie's friend any more.

"...Heather?" DJ worried over the fate of his sweetie.

Though Eva was a formidable opponent while alive, as a juju (voodoo) zombie she was no match for the agile, former ballerina's spy agency-honed martial arts prowess.

Courtney and even the extremely large Owen both fell before the flashing feet and karate hands of the ticked-off teen.

But numbers were on the zombies' side.

Heather was sneak-attacked from behind!

"Hey! Quit pulling my hair!" an annoyed Heath barked.

Turning 'round to face her unknown assailant, Heather was shocked to discover it was...

"Lindsay?? Not you, too!"

Distressed that even the blonde whose life she tried to save was attempting to kill her, Heather lost her edge.

And was immediately overwhelmed by a wave of unstoppable, undead flesh.

"She's not answering!!" DJ cried as he frantically punched in Heather's digits on his cell over and over again. "Oh no." He feared the worst.

"**Eeeeeek!!!!**" Sadie screamed in terror and pain as zombie Katie took a bite out of the heavy-set girl!

_Next:_

_The TDI trilogy is wrapped up with a twist in the most unexpected episode yet - The Big Finish!_

_It's really good! So don't miss it!!_


	12. Chapter Twelve: The Big Finish

**Author's Note: This chapter not only ends the story with a twist, it wraps up my whole TDI trilogy (including the two M-rated tales). Plus, it has a great ending! I really like it! This chapter is respectfully dedicated to TDI and all their fans. Be sure to check out the movie take-offs. Feel free to submit your own film ideas for TDA.**

TDI: Torture Cruise

Chapter Twelve: The Big Finish

"That last part is from the sequel, _Total Zombie Island_. So...What do you think of _TDI: Horror Cruise_?" Heather looked up after reading the script. "We can always add more build-up, scenes of us arriving on the cruise ship, the tour of the ship, with ominous signs sprinkled about, that sort of thing, but that's the heart of the movie I propose."

To say her fellow castmates were stunned was an understatement.

"Let me get this straight...You kill most of us in the movie, then bring us back as _zombies_ in the sequel?" an incredulous Gwen asked.

"Actually, Gwen, you're a ghost. And I think Beth is, too. It's the rest that are zombies!" Harold helpfully interjected.

"Whatever!"

"I don't see the problem, Gwen. Considering some of the personalities around here, a zombie would be a step up!" the haughty rich girl retorted. "Would you rather have us sitting around talking for 90 minutes? The audience wants action! This is the film contest for _Total Drama Action, _isn't it?"

"Yes, Heather, it is the special end of season challenge for TDA open to all 22 former TDI campers. And the winner does get their movie produced!" said Chris the perpetually amused host. "But somehow, I don't think the proper genre for a film version of TDI is torture porn!"

"What?? It's not porn!" Heather protested. "It's a horror movie! And horror means bank at the box office! It'll be a big hit!"

"Torture porn...It's a horror movie where various characters are tortured to death, like _Saw _or _Hostel._" Harold informed the Queen Bee.

"Whatever, film freak!" the raven-haired one snapped.

"I know who I'd like to see tortured in a movie!" LeShawna vented. "Mm-hmm! I'd pay good money to see that!"

"Heather, the challenge was to come up with a viable concept for a TDI movie, not engage in petty revenge fantasies where your fellow contestants are knocked off!" Courtney bitched.

"TDI has too many people for a movie franchise, so there had to be a...winnowing out process." Heather calmly explained while she buffed her nails.

"Way to eliminate the competition, babe! Who's left on the girls' side? You, Sadie and LeShawna?" Duncan laughed.

"You got a problem with the way I look, gangsta boy?" the proud LeShawna shot back.

It seemed everyone had a problem with Heather's proposed film.

"You turned me into a whore!!" an angry Bridgette took exception to her film persona.

"You turned me into a psycho killer!" Beth balked.

"You said Lindsay is a rape victim!" Tyler stood up for his girlfriend.

"You made me gay!" Noah squawked.

"Bi." Cody corrected his TDA castmate.

"Hey! I'm not that, either!" Noah objected.

"Yeahhhhh. Okay. Sure."

"Points for the scarred Justin, though. Definitely an improvement!" Noah zinged the male model, who then glared at the sarcastic know-it-all.

"Now you're a teen spy?? What's that all about? Afraid your real life isn't cool enough?" Trent needled the stuck-up rich girl.

"At least you survive, Trent!" Gwen joked.

"Only until the sequel, I'm sure!" Trent replied.

"You could have asked meabout making me your boyfriend in the script!" an annoyed DJ railed. "How am I gonna explain that to my girl back home?"

"It does show Heath in a most sympathetic way, eh?" Ezekiel commented.

"Only 'cause people don't know what she's really like!" LeShawna noted.

"I'm not even in it!" a miffed Chris moaned.

"And you traumatized poor Katie! She'll never go the dentist again!" Sadie said as she comforted the terrified, trembling teen.

"You people need to seriously lighten up! All your complaints are silly! Hello, it's a movie, not real life! The writer merely portrayed things in the most dramatic way! You act as if I gave him a list of things I wanted the film to do, and he wrote it that way! That's just ridiculous! Oh, and Lindsay? That was a _great scene _we had! The critics will love it!" Heather defended her movie proposal.

"Yeah, a great scene for you!" Lindsay griped. "All I get to do is cry!"

"The writer?? You mean you didn't write it?" a puzzled Gwen said.

"I have better things to do with my time than sit in front of a computer for hours!"

"**Chris!!**"

"No rule against it. Sorry."

"Oh, and DJ? The movie-going public expects the lead, which is me, to be in a romantic relationship, and since your girlfriend wasn't seen on the show and you tested well in focus groups, you got the part." Heather casually informed the ribbon-twirling rhythmic gymnast.

"By which you mean people won't accept a sociopath who's unable to have a normal, healthy _human _relationship as the star of the movie!" Courtney cattily commented.

"I prefer the term 'independent woman'." Heather snootily responded. "It sounds so much worse when you say it!"

"What happens in the sequel? Do the rest of us die?!" a bitter Tyler insincerely asked.

"Don't give her any ideas!" Cody cautioned his fellow survivor.

"Ah, Heather could never pull it off! She's not that good an actress!" Geoff said.

"Hmphh!" Heather snorted.

"Well, I thought Sadie was very Shelley Winters." Harold said, and received blank stares in reply. "From the _Poseidon Adventure_? The first one?? Sighhh." Then Harold brightened. "Hey! It's a horror movie, so it'll probably be rated 'R'! Do you think we'll get to see boo-"

"See what, sugar?" LeShawna, hands on hips, dared her boyfriend to say 'boobies'.

Harold quickly got the message. "Nothing, my chocolate goddess."

"What's the high concept here? As a horror movie, it was kinda like 'The Suite Life On Deck Get Killed!' Noah smirked.

"Hey, I'd pay money to see that!" Duncan chuckled.

"Oh, did you ever see that show? Zach and Cody were so cute when they started out!" an excited Lindsay exclaimed. "Then they got older. Now they're just sad." Lindsay regretted time's cruel march.

"If we did the movie, how much food would I get to eat?" Owen eagerly inquired. "Sometimes they have to shoot a lot of takes, right? Mmmm!" Owen rubbed his belly in anticipation of eating, over and over again, the biggest spread he'd ever seen in his life!

"The title is pretty accurate. Any cruise with Heather would be a horror!" Beth joked, to much appreciative guffaws from her fellow castmates.

"Ooooohhhh! You people are impossible!" Heather fumed as she gave Beth the evil eye. "Didn't anyone like the movie?!?"

"E-Scope as a zombie queen! E-Scope like!" Izzy cheered.

"But, Izzy, you're not really the zombie queen! You're possessed by an evil spirit, who kicks your soul out and probably sends it to hell, then steals your body!" Eva attempted to explain the plot to the nutty redhead.

Izzy stared blankly ahead for a moment. Her eyes blinked. Then..."I'm the zombie queen! Woo!" Izzy raved as she joyously pumped her fist.

"Great. The crazy girl likes it. I'm doomed!" Heather whined.

"Chef liked it. Anytime Chef sees you juvenile monsters get what's coming to you, Chef enjoys it! Of course, Chef would have liked it a lot better if Chef was in it!"

"At least you're in the sequel!" Chris bitched. "I don't even get that!"

"Well, Heather's movie is true to life. A reanimated corpse is the only way Chef can get a date!" Duncan said to amused snickers from Geoff, DJ and Owen.

"I heard that, you little criminal!" Chef yelled, and brandished a cooking skillet.

"Oh, like any of you have a better film?" Heather dared the other castmates. "I doubt it!"

"That's what we'll find out!" Chris said. "Moving on..."

"Hey, wait a minute!" Bridgette said after she yanked the script from Heather's hand and scanned the cover page. "This is the same writer who did those disgusting sex stories about us!"

"Oh, hey, it is!" Geoff said upon recognizing the name. "And those were, uh, terrible stories, Bridge! Totally rank!"

"So he's written some risque stories about us? So? This is still good!" Heather dismissed the new complaint.

"You wouldn't say that if you knew what he wrote about you and Gwen!" Duncan teased.

"Me...and Gwen? You mean...me and her...having...?" a very, _very _shocked Heather gasped. "Aghkk gag!!"

"Mm-hmm. You got it!"

"Har-**old!** You were the one who put me in contact with this guy! You have some explaining to do! Don't you run away from me!"

"So you read the stories, too?" Geoff asked Duncan.

"Nah. Never heard of 'em! But I figured that'd set her off! Ha!"

"Oh. Then you don't know what he wrote about you."

"What? What did he wrote about me??!"

"Easy, dude! I'll whisper it to ya."

"Psst pst."

"No!"

"Yes. And that's not all!"

"Pst psst."

"How could he know I..? I mean, for spreading lies about me, that writer is so dead!" an enraged Dunc clicked open his switchblade knife.

**(It's a good thing for me Duncan's parole officer won't let him leave Canada, eh? - Author)**

"So the drama!" Chris quipped. "Now let's see what else you over-sugared teens have for us!"

"Me and Geoff have a movie!" Bridgette chirped.

"Yeah! It's called 'Bucking The Waves'!" Geoff added.

"We play a couple who compete in the first ever Pro Tandem Freestyle Surfing Championship!" Bridgette continued.

"I play a bucking bronc rider who gets banned from the sport after taking too many chances." cowboy Geoff said.

"And I play a tandem surfer who needs a partner after my first few have...accidents, and don't want to surf with me anymore." accident-prone Bridge said.

"Together we work out our problems and race to win the championship!" Geoff said with a smile directed at Bridgette.

"At the end, Geoff picks me up when I'm on my surfboard and throws me and my board into the water so Geoff and I can cross the finish line at the same time! It's amazing!" Bridgette said as she looked into the eyes of Geoff.

"No, you're amazing!" Geoff admired.

"You are!" Bridgette returned the compliment.

Then they made out.

"Mmm mwah!"

Nonstop.

"Wow! A romantic comedy with sports, drama and action! I like it!" Chris gave his instant review.

"I wonder if they know they'll have to act like they don't even like each other for most of the movie?" Noah sneered.

"Now now! Don't be such a downer!" Chris said as the hot to trot couple refused to break their liplock and come up for air. "Who's next?"

"Ooh! Ooh! Me!" a hyper Courtney blurted. "I developed a movie treatment...with Duncan. He helped a little bit. I call it 'The Runaway Felon'!"

"Oh, like the Runaway Bride?" Chris asked.

"No! There's no brides in it!" Courtney rejected the errant comment.

"Oh, I get it! It's like _The Fugitive_! So you're the cop and Duncan's the wanted criminal, right?" Chris speculated.

"No. Duncan's the detective." Courtney pointedly corrected the TV host.

"I've been around a lot of cops! I know how they act." Duncan clarified.

"I see."

"And I'm the felon. The totally _innocent, _did nothing wrong, trying to clear my name, felon!" the very loud Court bellowed.

"So this is another romcom?" Chris wondered.

"Excuse me?"

"Romantic comedy, genius!" Noah chortled at the ignorance of the film industry constantly displayed by the other castmates.

"As if! This is an action suspense thriller! Duncan! Are you spreading stories about us again?"

"Not me, Princess!"

"I told you not to call me that!"

"Sorry. Oh. Wait. I know a better way to apologize!"

_SMA-ACK KISSS _

"Duncan!!...Mmm, mmmm..."

Courtney's protest was very brief, and soon they were competing with Geoff and Bridgette for winner of the world's longest kiss!

I can see the poster now" 'Her only crime was stealing his heart'." Noah laughed.

"O-kay!" Chris grinned. "Who else?"

"I've got a scifi film!" Harold shouted. "Invasion of the Space Ninjas! I have to save Earth from evil alien martial artists!" Harold yelled as he demonstrated his 'mad moves'. "Kiii-ya! Oh, and LeShawna is the beautiful Queen of Space! It's awesome!"

"Never saw that coming!" Chris snickered. "Any more?"

"Me and Trent had a film." Gwen spoke up. "But we weren't sure how...popular...it would be."

"Gwen plays a street artist who runs into trouble from a mob, who then transform into a pack of rats with beehive hairdos and chase Gwen, and I play the musician whose music saves the day!" Trent gave the unusual synopsis.

"Sorry, I don't think my mind is 'expanded' enough to get that!" Chris waved off the duo's arthouse film.

"Didn't you have an idea for a movie, Noah?" Chris asked.

"Not as such." Noah denied.

"Yes you did! You told us all about it!" Izzy roared.

"It was a _concept, _but I didn't fully develop it." Noah explained.

"Did did did did did!!" Izzy screamed.

"And what would this..._concept _be?" Chris inquired.

"It was a buddy picture. But not like any buddy picture ever done before! The two leads would actually be intelligent! It's everyone _else_ who would be insane!" Noah elaborated. "Kind of like this show!" he sneered.

"Uh-huh!" Chris retorted. "And who would be your bud-dy?"

"It doesn't really matter now." Noah muttered.

"Noah? Answer the question, dude!"

"Cough -Cody- cough!"

"I can't hearrrr you!"

"**Cody!!**"

Much snickering all around ensued.

"What? No one else put him in their movies! I felt sorry for him! Geez!" Noah justified his queer movie idea.

"DJ?"

"Bunnies!" DJ exclaimed. "Lots and lots of bunnies! Everyone loves bunnies!"

"Man has a point!" Chris conceded. "Zeke?"

"A film? Um, well, you know..." Ezekiel attempted to explain his predicament.

"They don't cover movie-making in home school, eh?" Chris realized.

"I've only _seen _a few movies in my whole life, and you want me to make one??" the hapless prairie boy howled.

"I have a good one! It's about a superior being with unusual powers who attracts a girl who then enters his world and finds out how different his life is." Justin gave his movie pitch. "I call it 'Spotlight'."

"I see! It's like _Twilight_!" Chris recognized. "So you play a vampire, eh?"

"Vampire? What are you talking about?? It's a documentary about me!" the model with the power to cloud women's minds with his incredible beauty recoiled at the comparison to undead bloodsuckers.

"I'm in it, too! I play the girl!" Katie squealed. "Eeee!"

"Eeee!" Sadie also squealed. "You're going to be so excellent in the movie, Katie! And it's so great me, Beth, Eva, Izzy and Owen appear in it, too, as other people who are attracted to Justin!"

"How special! Ahem! All of those are winning films, I'm sure!" Chris critiqued. "Teen fangirls notwithstanding, we need a project that involves all of the cast, and Heather's 'Horror Cruise' is the only one that does that!"

"I told you losers it was the best one!" Heather stuck her nose in the air and folded her arms.

"I know what we could all do! Our own version of High School Musical!" Lindsay whooped. "That would be so cool!"

"Lindsay, we're not doing HSM!" Heather shot down the blonde's idea.

"But...but..." a demoralized Lindsay muttered.

"Don't worry about it! Heather's film will be fine!" Chris assured the other castmates.

"Wow, Chris! I'm surprised you agree with me!" Heather commented.

"You should be!" Chris smirked.

"What?"

"Nothing."

Later, after filming wrapped on _TDI: Horror Cruise_, a notice was posted on the studio's bulletin board.

_Auditions for TDI's second movie_

_High School Musical_

_1 PM sharp in the theater_

"What is this??" Heather raged.

"Isn't it great?! We're doing another movie!" Lindsay cheered.

"No, it's not great! Chris! What's going on??" Heather demanded. "Are you delaying _Horror Cruise_?"

"No. That's still proceeding in post-production and will be released as scheduled. But the producers decided they wanted to do another film, so HSM it is!" Chris merrily explained.

"Why do I get the feeling that's not the whole story?"

"Why, whatever do you mean, Heather?" Chris smiled wickedly.

"Hmmmm."

"This is going to be so much fun! The others have already picked their favorite parts!" Lindsay informed the scheming Asian-Canadian.

"Already? Who's playing Sharpay??" Heather ordered.

"Cornelia."

"Courtney?? She couldn't hit a note if her life depended on it! She can barely carry a tune!" Heather criticized.

"I heard that!!" Courtney screamed from down the hall.

Heather made a face at the former C.I.T., then continued. "And no one can sing 'Fabulous' like I can! I'm nailing that role!"

"Who's Troy?" Heath asked.

"Trevor. Did you know he can sing AND dance?" Lindsay said with no small measure of amazement. "He's a lot better Troy than Tyrone could ever be! But please don't tell him I said that!"

"So who's Gabriella? You?"

"Well, it doesn't have to be me. Actually, Grace was asked by the other castaways to play Gabriella."

"Gwen?? Oh, this I have to see!"

"Have fun, kids! I'll be in the editing room working on _Horror Cruise_!" Chris said with a grin.

After the auditions...

"I got my part!" Lindsay shrieked in glee.

"Me too!!" Heather exuberantly yelped.

"Wheeee!" The two girls jumped for joy and hugged, then hopped up and down some more.

Then Heather realized what she was doing, broke the uncharacteristic embrace and stopped the impromptu display of emotion.

"Ummm..." Heather began.

"Yeah." Lindsay responded.

"That was...weird. Let's never speak of it again!" Heather strongly suggested.

"Okay!" Lindsay smiled.

And smiled.

And smiled some more.

"Why are you smiling like that?!" a visibly ticked Heather demanded.

"Nothing."

"You're still smiling!"

"I know."

"Sighhh." Heather sighed. "So, uh, Lindsay..." Heather sought to change the subject. "What part did you get?"

"Taylor."

"Get out! The smart one??"

"Yep!" Lindsay beamed. "It's called 'acting', Heather!"

"Ha! I'm impressed! You're alright, Lindsay!"

"Now you're doing it!" Linds said with a Cheshire cat grin.

"Doing what?"

"Smiling!"

"I am not!"

"Are too!"

"Am...Oh, I see. Cute, Lindsay. Real cute. But I'm not falling for it!"

"Falling for what?"

"This whole..._friendship_ thing!" Heather said the 'f' word with a shiver. "It never...just forget it! Later!" she snapped and walked away, leaving a disappointed Lindsay behind.

At rehearsal for _TDI: HSM_, a further surprise...

"I'm sorry, but I can only do this part in an ironic way!" Gwen declared to the director. "I can't play it straight! Gabriella is so...Eww!...Not me!"

"Don't give me that!" the director barked. "She's an emo just like you!"

"Excuse me?"

"And if that or Trent as the lead isn't enough...motivation, remember why we call it acting, little missy!" the director ordered. "Now, again, from the top!"

"Wait...Courtney is the director???" Heather noticed. "What happened to Chris?"

"He's busy finishing the other movie!" Courtney loudly explained. "He needed a replacement and, obviously recognizing my artistic and executive talents, asked me to direct HSM! Who needs a silly singing voice, or performing like a trained seal? Behind the scenes is where the real power is!!"

"You are so hot when you power trip!" Duncan lustily complimented the girl of his dreams.

"You, you stop that!" said the flustered Courtney, struggling to control her desire to jump Dunc's bones. "Now get back to work!" she screamed through the director's megaphone. "That scenery won't paint itself!"

After _TDI: High School Musical _was done (and in record time, too, due to Courtney's Type A tendencies that wouldn't settle for anything less than perfection in the shortest amount of time possible), the castmates prepared for their trip to the premiere of _TDI: Horror Cruise _at...

"Hold on! Sundance??" Heather cringed. "That's for loser independent films and arthouse crap no one cares about! **Chris!!!**"

"Now, Heather, many films have generated great buzz and went on to huge success after premiering at Sundance!" Chris said with a mischievous grin.

"Yeah, right! I bought a whole wardrobe for the south of France in May, so we better be going to Cannes!" the raven-haired Queen Bee insisted. "I have no interest in seeing Utah in January!"

"Don't worry! We're still going to Cannes!" Chris assured his star.

"Hmmm." Heather wondered.

At the Sundance premiere of _Horror Cruise_, the 22 TDI castmates took their seats in the dark theater while Chris and Chef went to the projection room to run the film.

Then the movie began...

"_How does one girl take over a production, kill off her co-stars and try to convince people to like her for it? Find out in TDI: Horror Cruise as Heather Nakamura's narcissistic personality runs rampant!"_

_"Lindsay! Listen to me!!" Heather commanded, speaking through the pane of glass separating the two. "Sharks are attracted to movement. So once you're in the water, go to the side of the pool and stay perfectly still! If they get too close, hit them in the nose or the eyes! I'll be in there right after you to rescue you! Do you understand?"_

_"Uh huh." Lindsay said through the tears running down her face. _

"Ha ha ha ha!!" the audience laughed heartily at the dark-haired teen's antics to portray herself as a serious, likable actress.

Heather, mortified, sunk in her chair and yelled "Chris! I'll kill you for this! You hear me? You're dead!"

"I guess Chris didn't like being cut out of the movie, huh?" Gwen chortled.

"Sure looks like it!" Trent merrily agreed, as the sardonic TV host continued his narration of Heather's worst traits, demonstrating them with a severely edited version of _Horror Cruise_. "He definitely inserted himself into it in the most interesting way! More popcorn?"

After the 'film' was over, the audience cheered and clapped. Heather, extremely embarrassed, slunk out of the theater unseen.

Heath was trying to prevent herself from hyperventilating when Lindsay caught up to her.

"I think the audience liked it!" Lindsay sincerely said.

"Are you kidding me?? Chris made a fool out of me in front of everyone!" Heather moaned. "This has to be the worst day of my life!"

Just then, a few theater-goers recognized the film's star and approached.

"Look! It's Heather from the movie!"

"Oh no!" the raven-haired one dreaded.

"Great film!" the young man complimented the stunned teen girl.

"And you're such a good sport for letting yourself be portrayed that way!" a young woman added.

"Yeah! Nobody could be that insane!" a third member of the audience praised Heather's performance. "You must be a great actress!"

"Really? Thanks! Thanks a lot!" Heather brightened and shook the hands of her fans.

"And you're Lindsay!" an appreciative viewer of the flick said. "How did you like making _Horror Cruise_?"

"It was a lot of fun!" Linds replied. "I had to wrestle a rubber shark for my big death scene! I just wish I had more of an opportunity to wear my bikinis! I have one for each season, you know."

The two girls quickly formed a receiving line to meet and greet fans of the new hit film at Sundance.

Without taking her eyes off of the fans or quit shaking their hands, Heather said "Thanks, Lindsay!"

Lindsay was taken aback for a second, then smiled and replied, without even stopping her meet 'n greet or looking at the supposed 'Queen of Mean', "Sure, Heather! No problem!"

Heather beamed and thought _She forgets everyone else's, but Lindsay __always__ remembers my name! Heh..._

_...But Chris is still dead!_

The End

_Awww!_

_Heather starts on the road to redemption_

_(which is not going to be easy for her, but it's a start)._

_And Lindsay re-discovers her niceness_

_(I hated how the first season changed her)._

_I love happy endings!_

_Stay tuned after the credits for an important announcement._

End Credits

_(Heather dances out and joins the rest of the cast)_

Sharpay (Heather): We've arrived because we stuck together

Champions one and all

All: We're all in this together

Once we know

That we are

We're all stars

And we see that

We're all in this together

And it shows

When we stand

Hand in hand

Make our dreams come truuuuue

Wild cats everywhere

Wave your hands up in the air

That's the way we do it

Let's get to it

Come on everyone!

_(Everyone dances around)_

Cast of _TDI: High School Musical_

Troy - Trent

Gabriella - Gwen

Sharpay - Heather

Ryan - Noah

Chad - DJ

Taylor - Lindsay

Kelsie - Beth

Jack Bolton (Troy's dad) - Tyler

Ms. Darbus - Eva

Zeke - Ezekiel

Martha - LeShawna

Jason - Justin

Skater dude - Cody

Jock - Geoff

Basketball player - Bridgette

Cheerleader - Katie

(Geoff and Bridgette were also the understudies for Trent and Gwen.)

(Courtney, Duncan, Katie, Sadie, Geoff, Bridgette, Cody, Izzy, Owen and Harold mainly worked behind the scenes, but also portrayed various extras.)

Outtakes

Troy (Trent): Look at me.

Right at me.

Like the first time we sang together.

Gabriella (Gwen): I...mmphh! Ha ha ha! I can't...Trent's got something stuck in his teeth!

CUT!!

_Sharpay (Heather) runs out onto the gym floor, which is littered with balloons._

Sharpay (Heather): These cookies are genius!

The best things I've ever tasted!

Will you make some more for me, Zeke?

_Sharpay runs to Zeke and hugs/tackles him._

Zeke (Ezekiel): Sure, Heath.

I might even make you a creme brulee, eh?"

Sharpay (Heather): What?? I may be getting along a little better with you people, but don't push it, prairie boy!

**Cut!**

_Courtney throws down her megaphone in disgust._

Courtney: Amateurs! Why, oh why, can't I work with professionals?!

_Courtney notices someone watching video on the computer._

Courtney: What do you think you're doing? This is a closed set!

_She rips the crewmember's headphones off, letting everyone hear what he was listening to - Christian Bale's rant on the Terminator: Salvation movie set._

"What the _bleep _are you doing?? Are you professional or not?

Do I _bleeping _walk around and rip that...No, shut the _bleep _up, Bruce!

Do I walk...No! No! Don't shut me up!

Am I going to walk around and rip your _bleeping _lights down? In the middle of a scene?

Then why the _bleep _are you walking right through? Ah ta da ta dah! Like this in the background?

What the _bleep_ is it with you? What don't you _bleeping_ understand?

You got any _bleeping_ idea about, hey, it's _bleeping_ distracting having somebody walking up behind Bryce in the middle of the _bleeping_ scene?

Give me a _bleeping_ answer!

What don't you get about it?

Oh, good for you! And how was it? I hope it was _bleeping_ good, because it's useless now, isn't it?

_Bleep's_ sake, man, you're amateur!

Courtney: Now that's a professional!

**Author: And now, Noah would like to make an announcement.**

Noah: Thanks. I would just like to say, I was picked to play Ryan in High School Musical solely due to my singing ability. I am not gay.

**Author: Uh, okay. But I would like to add this in no way implies Ryan is gay.**

Noah: Are you kidding me? He's totally gay!

**Author: You don't know that.**

Noah: He's fruitier than the grocery list of the cast of Boylesque!

**Author: Noah…**

Noah: Gayer than a ball game between Fire Island and Key West!

**Author: Noah!**

Noah: More homo than…

**Author: ****NOAH!!!**

Noah: …But I'm not. Gay, that is.

**Author: Okay. Glad we got that straightened out.**

Noah: A pun?

**Author: What?**

Noah: 'Straightened out'? Ha ha. Not!

**Author: Give it a rest, Noah. (Mutters under breath) You total, flaming qu-**

Noah: I heard that!


End file.
